That boy needs a whoopin'.
There is this kid in my 6 grade class that needs a whooping. He doesn't stay in his chair and he is a trouble maker. And don't worry, I don't whoop on the kids, I leave that to the chinese teachers.
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There is this kid in my 6 grade class that needs a whooping. He doesn't stay in his chair and he is a trouble maker. And don't worry, I don't whoop on the kids, I leave that to the chinese teachers.
I woke up today and I realized I had successfully caught the bug that was going around the gang the past couple days. Hopefully I will be better tomorrow. I spent the whole day drinking water, medicine tea, and working on my X-mas present for home. I went out to grab some lunch at the Hospital. However, it was about 130pm and they had shut the operation down so I trekked over to the noodle shop and got some yummy food. After that I headed back and continued my work.
I was doing a couple things.
1. Backing up all my mp3s onto DVD discs, about 25GB, to free up that space for video files. I need another hardrive. They got cheap ones here..I may just have to pick one up. It took me a whole day to copy the files to the DVD Disc and then burn it. I have 6 discs completed. Wow.
2. Importing some Beijing footage and editing it. Its alot to do. Very tuff. Frustrating becaues it keeps dropping frames and I have to babysit the videocapture. I don't know why this happened. It never drops this many frames like this constantly. Its always something.
I was able to sneak out for dinner. I went to Happy Time resturant. One of the few resturants with an English menu. I wasn't feeling 100% because I had that bug that has been going around and I spent most of the day in front of my computer..I fried my neurons. Getting out helped. I am gonna go to sleep early and try and sleep this off.
We will see how I feel tomorrow.
Ok, so today is Sunday and I have to teach in Guzhen. So I went. Class was good. Nothing super duper happened. Lynn reminded me that I had to teach kindergarten class at 3pm. Ok. Shouldn't be a problem. After guzhen teaching was over, I headed home and did some more DVD work. 3pm was rolling around so I head out for class. It was just two kids this time. Daisy, and a boy i have never seen before. Leo, the boy, was super quiet and withdrawn for about 30 minutes, but the last 10 minutes, he opened up and he was getting into it. I was teaching them throw and catch and I had them chuckin erasers around the room. I got them to tell each other to run here, there, everywhere.
After this class got over, I waited around the Bond office because the Bond gang decided to have a big Badmitten tournament. Yes thats right, a badmitten tournament. Here were the teams.. Team America, me and John. The England Everlasts: Sean & Suzannah. The Samurai: Rumi & Yumi. China 1: Jolleen and Lynn. China 2: Mountain & Salina. Toby and Robert made up their own, Ash would swap teams from time to time. Anywho, everyone was playing.
I am sorry to say that Team America failed to achieve victory in all three of its campaigns. We found ourselves in a quagmire(sp?). But then again, only countries full of morons take badmitten seriously...England, China, and Japan. These people were hardcore. ITS FRIGGIN BADMITTEN! They need to choose their strengths wisely. Maybe thats why they were losing in WWII. Anywho. While I was on the sidelines after our first tour was complete, i was just chillin and I noticed lots of little feet moving to a beat behind the curtain of the stage they were on in the auditorium that we were in. Hmmm...little kids dancing...that rules. Then, the curtain was pulled back and they were the ages of 3rd-5th graders. "Hey! I know a couple of you! You are in my classes." I saw a couple kids still practicing while all the others were running around punching one another. They were learning Chinese Latin Dance. Chinese because all the sexuality and sensuality of the latin style dances had been stripped away...but then again, these were just kids, so it didnt matter. I was surprised at their technical skills though.
I tried to speak to the instructor, but he had no clue what I was saying. I finally got him to understand that I have been dancing 7 years and I dance swing/lindy hop. I started to show the kids some steps and they were just laffing at me until I tried to get a kid to show them with. They were all running away from me until I snagged one unlucky child. She was willing so I showed her the dance steps and we danced to a song. It was great! I have been able to dance like that since I got to China. All the kids mouths dropped and I started picking the kid up and using her for areils since she weight about 30 pounds. That song was over and I snagged another kid and danced to that song again with another. The kids all enjoyed watching and so did the teacher. Whoops time for class again and I had to run off to a badmitten battle with China 1.
After we finished playing, it was dark and we went out to the dumpling house for dinner. The service there stinks. Took forever, but the sweet and sour pork and dumplings were so so so so so sooooooo good. After that we pretty much vegged out for the nite. We went back to John's house and watched Shaolin Soccer. It was surprising that Jolleen and Rumi had never seen it. Then went home and slept.
Ok. I woke up this morning at 645AM to the joyous sounds of The Cramps' "Zombie Dance" on my computer's mp3 alarm. If I could ever shoot a music video, I would totally do it for this song. I looked around to check my surroundings before I moved anywhere. I wanted to make sure that if I tried to move my body, and it blew up, I would be able to grab onto something. I was testing to see if my back had healed up at all...if it was better. I moved a bit, still sore. I got up and hit the snooze on the alarm. Well, I got up without out too much trouble. There were no shooting pains but there was still that dull ache. After I got up after the second alarm I headed into the shower, the heat of the water and the movement made me feel better. Once I started moving and stuff, most of the pain was gone, but it was still at about 65%. Still hurts and is sore. When I was done getting ready for class I checked the news and stuff. Its just more of the same, "Death, Destruction, Voter Fraud, Blue vs Red States, Scott Peterson, Bush is an Idiot, Bush is Praised, Terrorists Killed, Terrorists Kill, Kermit the Frog is Gay, Princess Di is Wearing a New Dress...". So, I turn my head to look out the windown and see the same damn thing everyday, the dirty bra & panties of the woman living across the street hanging out her window drying. Why don't I ever see that in the news.
Check some stuff and then head out to class. I am walking today, I don't want to chance anything with the bicycle. I get to school and eat my breakfast. Class starts and I got my 5th graders today. They are hit or miss classes. They pay attention at times and participate at times. Its the beginnings of puberty starting to hit. I taught the sound of "ou" and "ow" in mouse, cow, house, etc. I was able to make them enjoy it. Somehow.
During the break between the two morning classes, I searched online to figure out what I may have done to my lower back. I checked a couple websites and I narrowed it down to two things.
1. Pulled/strained/sprained muscle, tendon, ligament. I think that I may have pulled or strained something. Most likely.
2. Slipped or Herniated Spinal Disc. I thought that is possible that I did this. However, I worked down my spine and searched for any changes or pain i came across last nite and there was nothing. So, if I did have a slipped disc, it must have gone back in.
I mentioned what I did to Coco and Ivy. Ivy offered to bring me some medicine. I said OK. She asked if I went to the hospital. I said, "No. They would look at it and say, 'Put some heat on it and rest'" She said, "Probably."
I then asked Coco if there was anyone who did acupuncture around. Hell, I am in China, why not try out some Chinese Medicine. She said yes. She then said she will take me to a Chinese Doctor during lunch. Well, thanks. There is a place right down the street. After that, I had about 30 minutes left till my next class. I had lent Coco my new DVD copy of Return of the Jedi, I made her watch all 3 movies. She returned it so i was flipping thru some scenes on Anna's computer while she was at class. Time for class.
My second class went well, with nothing super special besides the childrens' smiles to write about.
Coco came and got me and we hopped onto her scooter and headed to the place. It was really close. I got off and entered. There were lots of people there, not as much as the hospital, but about 15. The place was small, thats why it seemed like alot. Most of them were parents with children, so I guess there is a Kid doctor there. A bunch of kids were hiding behind their parent's legs and staring at me from behind the legs. I got a couple kids to be more relaxed and say things to me. Super cute. I then waited with Coco to see one of the doctors. The doctor was treating this guy with possibly a sprained wrist...rubbing it and putting the universal plant paste onto it. (more about that later)
Coco mentioned that this office is famous in Xiaolan. I looked around...It looked like every other dirty, poorly constructed chinese building. They obviously don't do alot of sanitization around here. I dread to see what the inside of the hospital looks like. So I am sitting there waiting with Coco for this doctor to finish up with the other guy. He's done.
Coco explains to him whats wrong and he has me sit down backwards on a chair. He then massages the area and starts pushing on various pressure points. Throws some oil on it and massages for about 10-15 minutes. He is chatting with Coco and Coco is acting as an interpreter for the both of us. He is hitting these pressure points in my lower back and making me jump a bit. Not from pain of the injury but from the intense pressing of the pressure points. After he is done, he tells me to get up and move around. It was kinda freaky, becase I could barely feel the pain anymore. I was moving my body around with ease. I was really surprised. He then put together a plant patch.
Ok. Chinese medicine has this universal cure medicine. Its basically a heat patch. Its made out of ~35 different plants all mashed together and made into a paste. It looks like soft chocolate fudge from Mackinack Island. He spreads it out on some cloth and then puts some black oil on it, followed by some salt (i think...it was crystalline and white) and this light brown powder. He mixed it all up then slapped it on my lower back, where the spine meets the pelvis. The chinese use this to help with pain. Its used for muscle aches, headaches, and anything else you can come up with. I am sure they use it for cancer as well.
After that I paid 30RMB and headed out with Coco. The guy was very nice and chatted alot. It was a good experience. I felt much better, butI still felt a bit of pain that I think can only go away with time and rest.
Coco and I headed over to the Hospital because they have this little shop that sells really good food. And its super cheap...3.5RMB for alot of good food. Yummy.
I told Coco thank you for everything. I told her that I could walk home so she could go back to her place for the next two hours. I went home, ate, watched Team America and rested my back. I then headed out for class again.
I dislike these 6th graders. They just don't listen or pay attention. During one point of the silence that they produce, some kid dropped a glass and it shattered everywhere. I can tell you, that was very odd to hear in a classroom. You don't really expect the kids to have glass products in class. I don't remember having glass cups when I was in school. Maybe I am just getting too old. :D They were just irritating.
The second 6th grade class went better. They got into the material more and the activities I prepared. I sent this girl to the front of class because she wasn't paying attention and causing distractions. She also wouldn't participate. I use some of the kids to help illustrate a point and they get all defensive and make a scene about not going up to the front of the room. So I kick them in their behind and put a stun collar on them...like the one from Running Man...and if they dont do as I say, their head will explode. Not really, thats just a joke. I coerce them to the front and then they enjoy what I have them do. They cause more of a scene by not wanting to go up than actually going up. The genious logic that is adolescence.
All the while I am having class, this medicine patch is working...well, its staying hot. At one point in my classes I started to sweat a bit.
I then headed out to kindergarten class. It was the day of the 10 Kid Spaz Class. They were surprisingly docile today. They did a few things like run out of class and down the hall, but I am used to that now. I only had to yell a couple of times.
After kindergarten I headed home. I spent the evening finishing up the wedding DVD and starting some other project. I also removed my medicine pad. I hate it when people use tape to hold things onto your body...its such a pain to remove it. I had to wait at least 30 minutes until I could wash the crap off. My lower back was all stained like I was rolling around in dirt.
I then headed to bed. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
Classes today were fine. The only big thing worth writing about is how I hurt my back.
I went to the gym...my normal routine. I was stretching out after warming up on the bike. I was holding my positions for a while and then moving slightly passed it to try and increase my range.I was doing really good, except during the one where you spread you legs and touch the ground, I must have pushed to far because my lower back was a bit sore when i stood back up. So, I was careful about it.
Throughout the day I was massaging it and rubbing it, trying to help it out. But then in Kindergarten, about 10 minutes after I started, I was going around crouched down shaking hands and asking children questions, and all of a sudden I felt a tug or snap or ripped in my lower back then terrible pain. OW! I was able to stand up. It hurt, I was able to bend, and it hurt...it hurt the most to bend backwards. But I could barely move my upper body or it would hurt. Right when it happened one of the Enforcers saw the look on my face. So I had Owen do stuff for me like pull out the table and physcial labor stuff. Man this hurt. Walking seemed to help but just a bit. Owen asked if I was alright and I told him I hurt myself.
I continued teaching, I just didn't do anything that would hurt. I was doing competitions with the kids on number recognition, 1-30 and they were enjoying it. However, while I asked for one girl to come up, the girl sitting next to her jumped up and grabbed my crotch. So i put her in the corner and after laughing at me, the Enforcer scolded the little girl.
Not five minutes later, another little girl decided to take her shirt off and run around the room. Man. What is up with these kids. The enforcer took care of this one.
Instead of me playing Head, Shoulders,Knees,and Toes with the kids, I used one of the kids as a model. I would point at the parts and have the kids touch their own. It was humorous. The teachers were giggling.
I then headed home. I pretty much spent the evening laying down and not moving.
Around 9pm I took a bath in one of the tubs at the house. I had to fill it up with the shower head. I couldn't use the faucets on the bath...i had to use the shower head. Thats chinese construction for you. So it took awhile to fill up enuff so I could submerge my lower back. I think it helped a bit. Hopefully tomorrow its better. I may try to see a chinese doctor...who knows what will happen.
I woke up at 645AM today so i could shave and get ready for the festivites. I had my vid-camera batteries all charged. I had some tapes. My digital camera is all charged up. I'm ready. I get to the Bond office at 830AM. Apparently someone told John that it was formal, so he showed up in a suit. I realized once we were there that it was formal. No one told me. We got in the Bond van and we headed out to the park area. The place was busy. We got out underneath the makeshift entrance gate. Its like this plastic or papermache gate. Very cheesy. Check out the fotos. Apparently this festival takes place every year, but on a much smaller scale. But every 10 years they go all out with it. It was quite impressive.
We walk thru this thing and past the entrance to Longshan Park. Its very pretty this early in the day. We head to the new park where the festival will be taking place. Lots of people. We arrived at the entrance after walking around cluelessly for about 20 minutes. There is a registration table and a red walking carpet. We are government guests so we get to see the full show instead of just the parade that everyone else will see. This area is roped off and there are hundreds of Chinese already lining up behind the ropes. So, i am walking down this red carpet after registering, and I took some fotos of the people behind the ropes. Very odd experience. I guess i could chalk it up to movie stars in Hollywood...without all the screaming and throwing of underwear. Crazy.
We walk towards the sitting area and get our seats for the introduction and kickoff of the festival. There was this big pagoda and seats for the government members to sit around. I guess its called the Daus, or Dais. Whatever. Anyway. We got our seats right in front on the right side. Luckily this is a perfect place to videotape the parade that shows up later. It was about 920AM and we had 40 minutes until the speeches started. There was this chinese gong and drum band playing. Very loud, but cool. Since we had time to kill I went around taking pictures and stuff and looking at the stuff. There were two groups doing some Lion dancing. I saw that one of the groups was my running crew, so I took off over there to say hi. The old guys friend was there and I said hello and said "hi"to some of the others that I see alot. I took a bunch of fotos of them. I was about to leave to check some other stuff out when the headcoach showed up. He was happy to see me and I showed him that I was representing with the School T-shirt that he gave me the night before. He laughed. He had to go do something so I headed out with John to something that made my mouth drop.
John introduced me to Maria, his principal, and we walked to this area that looked like they had these floats with puppets on them...however, when we got closer, they weren't puppets. They were little kids! These kids were dressed up in chinese traditional outfits with Beijing Opera style make-up and in poses as well. From what I could tell is that there was a framework on these things in which the kids would sit, but their clothes and everything else made it look like they were defying physics. For example, there was this one kid holding an umbrella and on that umbrella stood to more children. I think there is a framework leading from the kid on the bottom up thru the umbrella up to the legs of the children. I have never seen anything like this. You really need to look at the pictures. They are just amazing. I can't really explain it. But, if you notice in some of the fotos there are birds that the kids are standing on...those aren't fake. They are real. Real birds were tied up with wire and tape and attached to the float. This was also kind of shocking. That would never fly in the states. I mean, members of a frat in Davidson College, giving props to my cousin, were busted for killing a goose. I was like a smack in the face...just like one chinese guy did to the dove...smacked it in the face a bunch of times.
After those awesome floats we headed back to the seats and I told Moses and Amy to go check them out. I then saw Hirano-San...the japanese man I met on my Beijing Tour. I asked to take a foto with him. Kool. I then sat down and more people started showing up. The crowd gathered and it was time to start. There I sat, with Robert (the new guy who is from New Zealand, not England) Mark Amy (england), and Toby (england). The government people started sitting down and getting stuff ready. Robert made a joke that they Dais/Daus looked like a UN meeting. I added more to the joke by saying, "I wonder if they will be as ineffectual as the UN"...that received a couple giggles from Robert and Mark. But not Toby. Toby decided to get into another arguement during the festivities. "And who made it so? The US by not following UN procedure." SHUT UP, TOBY! YOU FRUSTRATE ME TO NO END! So then I piped in, "No, the UN has been ineffectual for a long time." Mark asked, "Is this the time and place to discuss this guys, I don't think so." I agreed and stoppded but then Toby decided to add more and say that the UN does alot and he prefers the UN to "your lot - International Corporations is all the US Gov really is..." and they kill people. "[The US] has turned Iraq into a graveyard."
"EXCUSE ME!?! America has not turned Iraq into a graveyard. Saddam turned Iraq into a graveyard. And would continue to do so. Americans do not target civilians and murder them for no reason." I decided not to add anything about the horrids of Abu Garrahb prison and the like to prevent another line of Anti-US sentiment from Toby.
Toby then added a comment, which is a good point, I agree somewhat with, but I think its a stretch, "Let's look at the people who have defied the League of Nations and UN...Stalin, Hitler, a couple other names I forgot, and Bush". Good point - I said. However, I dont' know if Bush and Hitler could be compared that easily.
I then finished the arguement by saying, "If the UN was effective in anyway why is there genocide in Darfur, why was there Genocide in Bosnia-Herzogovina, why didnt the UN do anything for Somalia, why is Milosevic still in court and not in jail, why didnt they ever stop Saddam, why doesn't the UN stop all the murder and killings in Africa, why couldn't they stop the U.S. from invading Iraq, why didnt they do anything to stop Al Queda, why didnt they stop the Taliban from performing crimes against humanity, why don't they do anything to stop all the injustice that they should be preventing. All they do is talk and recommend things. They come out and condemn actions with speeches and words, but when do they act? And when they do act, whats the use of sending a handful of UN Peacekeepers to a Civil War. And weapons inspectors!!! If people want to build a nuclear bomb, they can hide it! What good are inspectors gonna do?" Its all bureaucratic B.S. This ended the arguement. Thankfully. I can take much more of him. I wonder how many comments I am gonna have on that rant. :D
The speeches by the local government began. There were five speeches by respected member of the government and community leaders. I found it kinda ironcic. Almost all speeches mentioned Dr. Sun Yat Sen and his famous quote, "Dare to be the first." Yet all four speeches contained that phrase. It was obvious none of these people "dared to be first."
After those speeches were over. The released the balloons. Man, there was alot of balloons. I hope these balloons don't kill any dolpins...(helium balloons, when they start losing helium and fall back to the Earth, sometimes over oceans...some dolphins have died trying to eat them). After they released the balloons they had a 6 cannon salute with confetti. After all the confetti was in the air, it looked like a swarm of locust. Check out the fotos. Amazing. After that the parade began. I was in prime seating. I think the kids were first then some dragons showed up. My vid-camera got knock almost out of my hands by a passing dragon. That should be interesting footage. THere were lots of Lion Dance troups. There was some group of ladies wearing pink and playing a drum. I was videotaping it all. I was waiting for my lion dance crew and they finally showed up and I was surprised. They were the last of all lion troups. And there was sooo many of them. I never realized how many of them there were. There had to be 20 - 30 lions runnnig by. They just kept coming. But first there were 2 dragons that showed up with the really old sifu wearing the Hung Gar outfit...leather belt with studs and leather gauntlets with studs. He saw me and motioned for me to come out and perform with the troup but I couldn't. The parade organizers told him to keep moving. That would have been cool though. A couple people from the troup waved. I got it all on tape. Before we left we were tlaking with the Japanese contingent and we all took some fotos together. Around this time tons of Chinese had surrounded us to watch white and japanese people take funny pictures.
After the parade passed us we headed to the car. We were gonna take the car to the Flower Hotel for lunch. We should have walked the whole way. We walked about 10 minutes when we couldn't move in traffic. I have never seen the city so crowded. All of the 300,000 people of Xiaolan must have been out in full chinese force. Walking across the street at will. It was amazing. A pain in the ass, but amazing. And of course on the way there Toby started knocking the US for no reason. I had to hold back. I so wanted to punch him in the back of the head. Robert and Mark watched as I steadied myself and they giggled.
We decided to get out and walk after about 40 minutes of going pretty much no where. we got there 5 minutes later. On the way there, I introduced John to The Rev. Horton Heat with the song, "Bales of Cocaine". He got a kick out of it. As we walked into the entrance there was a long line of workers ready to greet us. "Hello". I go upstairs and meet with some people. We sit down and begin to eat. The bring around this pig that was really good. But they have cherries with blinkin lights inside that they use for eyes. It was wierd. We ate and had a good time. We also had some fish balls and fried bananas. I went to grab a fishball with my fingers because trying to pick them up with chopsticks is a major pain. They also had these little paper cups they were in, so I felt that you could pick them up. Lynn just said, "Aiya, that's so rude! Using your fingers." So I responded. "Oh...let me get this straight...its rude to take a fish ball from a plate with your fingers, but its not rude to pick your nose in public, belch/fart without saying excuse me, make horrendous sounds with your throat before spitting on sidewalks/walls/streets, and going to the bathroom on the sidewalk." She didnt say anything after that.
Now, this is where the day gets really interesting. Someone pulled out some Bei-jiu. (potent chinese wine). The stuff usually tastes vile, but this must have been expensive and potent because it tasted somewhat good and was most likely made with roses. It smelled good compared to the others stuff we usually get.
Now. We just had a couple shots to greet each other. But then some chinese came over and wouldn't let us get away with not doing some shots. So we did. After that, I cut myself off. The next time the waitress came by she tried to refill my glass but I said no. Then, more chinese came to celebrate with us. Our table was getting a bit louder...and crazier. It was from the alcohol...check the fotos for my flower debacle. So this other chinese guy got the waitress to fill my glass when I wasn't looking. He then gave me the cup and I said no. Originally I tried passing some sprite off as Bei-jiu, but that didnt' work. So, they were pushing me to drink it. I wasn't gonna drink it until the guy physically forced me to drink it. ...I know what you are thinking...how could I allow that. Ok.
1. I was already a bit tipsy from the previous stuff.
2. I was sitting down, he was standing, and the cup was near my mouth.
3. I am not gonna hit this guy or be that offensive.
4. He grabbed the glass and basically poured the stuff down my throat.
I was pissed don't get me wrong, i didnt want him to do that, but I was not in the position or right mind to do anything. The guy continued to hang around while other chinese toasted others at the table. This dude kept his hand on my shoulder. What's up with the touching dude. All the chinese have to touch.
He then gave me his card...i grabbed it with my teeth. If not drinking didn't offend him, that most likely did. Offend this, sucka! Lynn couldn't stop laughing. I told her to order me lots of tea and tea with sugar. I needed to flush my system, but I feared it was too late...and I was right. We'll get to that later.
As we head out to leave, we were some of the last ones to go, the waitresses and workers were standing in a long line to say goodbye. So, me, with a chrysanthemum on head and an orange in my mouth, motioned for a line of them to raise their right hand out. I ran down the line and High-Fived all of them. IT ROCKED! They all got a kick out of it. We then left the hotel. A little boy gave Rumi a flower so I had him give it to her again and I took a picture. It was so adorable.
The gang wanted to get some ice cream from McDonald's and Toby got all upset. I don't want to go to McDonald's. We are in Xiaolan why do we need to go to McDonald's. Well, Toby, there is no better ice cream in Xiaolan. McDonald's is the best. Its the truth. Chinese ice cream isn't very good. So, he waited outside as we got some ice cream.
We headed back to our place...its about 230/300PM. Once we got back to the house, we were playing pool, listening to music and hanging out. I was drinking tons of water. Just kept drinking it. But, I drank tooo much water. And proceeded to pray to the porcelain good...around 4pm. I felt worlds better afterwards. I gots to stop this.
So, i rested a bit...Toby passed out on the couch and was in the fetal position. The rest of us were just relaxing, playing pool, and just chilling. We had to be at the government building at 8pm for fireworks. So, Jolleen, John, and I headed over there on motorbike taxis and Rumi and Yumi took a motorized richshaw since they were wearing Yukatas. It was so crowded. We couldn't even make it the whole way on the taxis. we had to get off an walk. So we did that. We met up with Robert at the gate and waited for the rest of the gang. The fireworks display was really good. I got some video. John mentioned that we should be watching this to the sounds of The Scorpions "Rock You Like a Hurricane". That gave me a good thought....
After the fireworks were over John, Jolleen, Yumi, Rumi, and I went over to Rumi and Yumi's place so they could change, then we went to 1+1 so I could get some contact solution. Apparently supermarkets in China don't sell it. You have to get it from a place that sells glasses and contacts. Yumi happened to have an extra bottle, so I got one. We got to John's place where we were gonna watch a movie. I asked the girls if they liked horror movies and they all said, "Yes". Ok....so we popped in Dead Alive. giggle. The first scene Rumi and Yumi freaked when they lop the hand of the guy and then his other arm because he was bitten by the zombie monkey.
They spent about 3/4ths of the movie behind pillows. It was hilarious. I asked many times if they wanted to watching something else, "No, this is fine. :D" Ok.
I love so many scenes in that movie...."I kickass for the Lord!!!" The kung fu priest rules! And the infamous lawnmowing scene. Hilarious. "Party's over."
After the movie we all headed home. I need sleep. Goodnite all.
After the late nite last nite I was hoping to sleep in for a bit. But no. There are these jerks doing construction work on the bottom part of the house. Not for us...but for a business thats going in down there. And of course, since Chinese construction and planning is sooo terrible, I can hear everything they are doing. So, about 8AM I am scared out of bed by a drill that can be heard throughout the house, but it is being drilled right underneath my bed and so I freaked out like it was coming thru the wall to get me. "Coming for the gweilo!"
Then I try to go back to sleep, but I get the occasional wake up by these drills. Also, I am in the sleep state where you do stuff you can't really control...like itching mosquito bites. Finally I am able to wake up enuff to put some stuff on it.
After I got up, pretty much all I have been doing was DVD work. I got alot accomplished...I think it looks pretty professional right now. I need to see it once its complete though. To see if I am right.
I went to Lion/Dragon Dance practice tonite. I had a good time. There were alot of people there. Everyone was preparing for the festival tomorrow. I just did my normal stuff. I had even more people staring at me. What the hell, how long are you gonna keep looking at me. I would think after a day or two the novelty would wear off. We had this meeting where I sat and the head coach talked to everyone for a bit. Then I got up and continued practicing. Then around 940PM, some of the students that have taken a liking to me were showing me a bit of the lion dance stuff. Picking the people up, sitting them on your head and swinging them around and having them stand on your thighs while you are in the horse stance. That was really fun. The headcoach was lauging and amazed that I was doing this already and he seemed to enjoy it. Great. After that I headed back here - it was 1015pm, I took a quick shower, hopped onto Peter's scooter, that he fixed, and went over to John's place and we hung out. Apparently, the scooter had an extra long wire for the blinker that was installed because the shop people fixed it and only had a long wire. So, this wire got tangled in the chain and popped it off. Peter fixed it. Toby, John, and I watched "BAADAASSSSS" the movie by Mario van Peebles showing the struggle his dad made to make, "Sweet Sweetback's Badaasss Song". It was a pretty good movie. The Detroit part ruled.
I'm am off to bed. I have a long day with the government at the Crysthanthemum festival tomorrow. Need to take lots of video and pictures.
Today was a long day.
All my classes went well today. I had 6 classes. My 5 Primary and 1 Kindergarten. They all went pretty good. The last primary class I had was 3rd grade. I had an hour to kill before Kindergarten. This 3rd grade class was the winner of their Sports Day competition, so they were treated to have a party last period. So I was invited and I sat amongst the kids and hung out with them. It was very nice.
Now, when I got to kindergarten, I sent a child to the headmaster the first time ever. I was so happy. There is this new kindergarten kid that came in about a week or two ago. I think I mentioned him before, he screamed in the Bizarro-Phil's ear on Wednesday making Bizaro-Phil cry. He was acting up alot and he seemed to be harassing one of the girls Mickey, so the next time he did it, she grabbed his fingers and twisted them making him cry. After about 30 seconds of whimpering he let out this pissed off howl at Mickey and screeched at her. "That's it. I ain't dealing with you anymore today!" I grabbed him threw him over my shoulder's and walked him down the hallway. I had Owen take him to the Headmaster. I went back to do the Hokey Pokey with the kids.
About the part where you put your whole self in, Owen, the Psycho, and the Headmaster arrived. The Psycho was crying and the Headmaster said something to Mickey...who just listened with her head down. But she didn't whimper at all. I was on Mickey's side. I wanted to smack this Psycho. I told Owen to tell her that ever since he showed up, he has been a disturbance. I doubt it will do anything.
From there, I met up with Peter. We were gonna go to Wooden Chair for dinner, but plans changed. We headed back here because his lady friend was coming over. I did some stuff for a bit then headed out on Peter's scooter to Mandarin Lessons. I grabbed some potstickers on the way.
I got to the lessons and they were good.
After that ended at 9pm, we were planning on heading to the Beer Gardens with the group. Salena wanted to ride the scooter before we left, so I turned it on and tried to show her, but as I turned left, the axle or gear broke. WTF! Ever since Peter got this thing, its been nothing but trouble. Ugh. So I put it in the office overnite.
We then started to head out, but Clyde was having another bday party. So, we stopped by. We hung out there for about 20 minutes then Toby, John, Sean, Robert (new British guy), and I headed out to the Gardens.
There were a bunch of tents set up. Special for the festivities this weekend. We were there for about 15 minutes when Yumi, Rumi, and Suzannah showed up with a couple other friends. Then John called Jolleen and she said she was coming over with about 5 people and some other people showed up too. So we had about 20-25 people. It was fun. Only about 10 of us headed out to Cowboy though.
But before we left to go to Cowboy, I had to deal with Toby knocking the US out of the blue so I told him to shut it. I tried to explain to him that both canidates for president would send the country in horrible directions. Bush is a terrible money hungry leader and Kerry would not be able to take control of anything leaving us open for more hell. He would not be able to reverse any of what Bush has done. So, how do you choose. John mentioned he would rather have a Dipshit in office than the Anti-Christ. Then I said, Bush isn't the Anti-Christ because the "Beast shall come in the form of a well respected man..." and Bush is not well respected. And I expect that most people at home who are reading this totally disagree with me as well but "Bush vs Kerry"...they are both horrible choices - none is the lesser evil. Toby added more of his assinign opinion and started talking about how the US is terrible and how the whole world is happy about our soldiers being killed. He was pissing me off. And he just didn't stop. And it was impossible to reason with him. Suzannah was able to stop him by singing him some stupid british song. Ugh.
So we went dancing. On the way there, someting happened to make me laugh really hard. First, for some reason, Sean, who wasn't 100% asked his chinese friend Miguel how to ride his motorcycle. Miguel showed him and Sean got on and took off. We were on the sidewalk. Toby, for some stupid reason decided to hold on to the back of the bike and run with it. So, Toby was running as fast as he could and then Sean came to a driveway and the sidewalk dipped down to meet the driveway and Toby just took a spill and rolled the whole width of the driveway...it was only about 6 feet. I couldn't stop laughing. I mean, you can't help laughing at something like that...we all were. If he hurt himself, which he didn't, he deserved it. So Sean kept speeding off down the sidewalk. We helped Toby up and he was all right.
We continued on our trek to the Cowboy bar. We got closer, and I mentioned, where is Sean. Where did he ride off to. And right after I finished saying that, he sped by on the road. Oh, there he is. As we turned the corner and got close to the entrance, Sean showed up. He was on the street and he tried to manuver the motorcycle onto the sidewalk so he could park it, but he gave it a bit too much gas and he lost control, went about 7 feet really quickly, and tipped the bike over. I saw this and ran over to him, when I got there he was already up and picking the bike up, he was checking the van that was inches in front of him and the bike. There was no damage. The only thing suffered was a scrapped knee. His ego didn't suffer either becuase I dont think he was in the capacity for it to suffer. I don't think I could ever forget those two images of Toby taking a spill and Sean taking a spill. British people need to learn balance. So, we entered the retchedness that is Cowboy.
It was fun eventhough the music sucked. Some chinese "artist" took the riff from "7 Nation Army" by the White Stripes and turned it into a terrbile chinese dance song. It was hilarious but it was cool to have a taste of Detroit in China. They also played this weird YMCA remix. IT was the song, but they sped up the vocal track so it sounded like chipmunks. Creepy. Then I ended up walking home. It was an overall long but good day.
Much to my surprise and slight irritation, when I arrived at Lion/Dragon dancing practice, there was a TV News crew. Apparently they didn't know if I was gonna show up tonite, but when I did they hurried their patoots to try and come up with a flash of the minute expose on a gweilo learning gung fu in China. Ugh. Don't isolate me from my fellow practitioners more than I am now. Damnit. The head coach was enthusiastic about doing this and so was his wife. I am thinking that they orchestrated this in some way to get them good publicity and when the TV people saw me they jumped all over me asking me to do this and that and answer questions. I was aware that this would help the school however I wasn't too happy that I just found out about it and was expected to do it. They do stupid shit like that over hear in China because they don't seem to care about others' feelings and they have no common courtesy or sense.
Since I knew that refusing to do any of this would make the headcoach lose face in front of the camera/news people and that I didnt want to incur any of his wrath over it later. I had to be a monkey for the nite and play by chinese rules since I want to learn alot of stuff from the coach and the coach's teacher. Inconsiderate jerks.
I am not trying to say I was upset about doing this, in fact I enjoyed it. It was just frustrating and embarrassing for it to be sprung on me with everyone just staring. Plus, I didn't feel prepared...I was worried I may pull another muscle and do more damage. It turned out though that by the time I got to practice, all I had to do was stretch out and most of the pain was gone. I think I just overexerted them. They were working fine tonite. I wasn't in the frame of mind either, so I had to get into that. When it was all over and done with I required that they send me a copy.
What they videotaped...
Me riding the bike into the warehouse and parking it and locking it up...(the locking part confused me...why do you need that?) Then they had the head coach pretend he was teaching someone something and they had me walk up to him...interupting him and saying hello. (great, they have video of the white american man being arrogant and interupting the teacher - thanks) From there i went and changed my clothes. Then I went to stretch out and they videotaped me doing various stretches. (I wanted to be like Jay and say, "....talking about the laziest men on Mars. GET THAT CAMERA OUT OF MY FACE! I'M GONNA BE DROWNIN' THAT THING IN BEER IF YOU DON'T STOP IT!") The headcoach came over to practice Hong Quan with me and the little kicking exercise that he showed me. He made me do stuff like going from Horse stance into front stance and shifting the power. Then he had me go to a wider area and we both did Hong Quan at the same time. After this they allowed me to get some water and then come back. This is where they interveiwed me. They asked me a bunch of questions (not in the order they asked them, i just remember these. Oh, and I answered them truthfully)
1. When/How did you learn chinese gung fu?
2. What do you find difficult about chinese gung fu?
3. What do you think of the Head Coach? - He's a retard. (just kidding..I didnt say that)
4. What do you think of Xiaolan? - I hated it until I found this group practicing. I mean, I come to China and there is no gung fu. Whats wrong with that picture? Now that I found this group, I like Xiaolan.
5. What do you think of the Xiaolan People? - Most of the Xiaolanese are ok. I have had some trouble with a few. I got yelled at a couple times, "Gweilo!" and people just stare constantly. Its very frustrating.
6. Do you want to teach when you go home? - Eventually. I don't want America being the fattest country in the world anymore.
7. Were you surprised to see these people lion dancing on these tall posts? -No. (this made them gasp) Lady, I have seen humans accomplish feats of greater difficulty...this is no surprise. Its awesome and amazing. But not surprising. I want to do it.
8. How do you communicate with the head coach? -Lots of body language and watching.
Those were pretty much the questions. I wonder how they will edit it together. They will prolly make it look like I am knocking America and calling China amazing.
From there, the head coach had me practice with the Dragon Head. He taught me something completely new while I was watching him and then doing it. It was all caught on tape. I wonder how much of a fool i looked like.
Well, that pretty much ended what I was doing on video. I gave my email addy to the people and I got their email addy and fone# so I can pester them for a tape. I then proceeded to practice on my own for the rest of the nite. The headcoach went off to do something with the camera people.
I went into the office to grab my stuff to leave and the old guy was sittin there with two of the co-coaches chatting. They had me sit down and rest. They tried a bit to chat with me about differnt styles I have looked at. From what I understood, I think the old guy wants to teach me some things. I am up for it. :D
They started talking about the staff and I tried to tell them that it was my favourite weapon to work with. So, from there, they ran and grabbed the special staff. This thing was 10 feet long. The old guy was teaching me the intro to a form that he knows. Very cool.
After we put the staff away the old guy left. I was about to leave when one of the younger students stopped me and basically made me wait. He was trying to say that the Head Coach would be back. he wanted me to wait. Thats what I got out of it.
While waiting, I was practicing some Shorinji Kempo joint locks on this kid and the other students were laffing cause I was throwin him around like a sack of potatoes. He would then try to throw me and then he would lose his balance and fall over because he was doing his San Da/Chin-ah techniques wrong. He then grabbed some practice lion heads and gave me one. So I got to play around with the lion heads. It was kool. I was trying to imitate what I had been seeing and then I added my own Phil-style of dance to it which made the other students laff. It was a good nite.
Finally, the head coach showed up with the camera crew again. They were gonna video tape some of the San Da troop that was there tonite breaking some boards and bricks. I think they were expecting me to act surprised by seeing this people break cheap pine boards. Nope. I aint impressed with stupid tricks anymore.
Finally, about 1130 we all left. Then the head coach told me to follow a couple people to that place we went to dinner last week. There was about 8 of us. We just had some drinks and some good food. But then the Head coach started yelling at the scrawny little kid, Fei Lo. I dunno what about, but i think it was his son. The kid started crying. You don't make him cry in front of a group, you're gonna give him a complex. After that killing of a great mood I headed home about 1230am.
I expect to hear from Donnie Yen in about 2-3 weeks. I will get the phone call and he will want me to be in his next movie. I have a friend in Hong Kong who knows his sister. Sweet.
The rest of the day. Eh, it was ok. I got up later because I didnt have to teach until 10am. Skipped the gym cause I didnt want to push to hard. My 3rd graders today were bad because Lucy was in Shenzhen today. 5th grade went well. I did some more work on the DVD i am working on. Kindergarten went well. I tried to get the bike brake fixed but the guy was out to dinner. That's pretty much it.
Today was ok. It also strengthened my hatred of my 6th grade classes today. May decided not to attend my second one and the first one, it wouldn't have mattered if she was there or not because she didn't offer any help then either. These kids just don't pay attention and do whatever they want. I dislike the first class more because they just don't do anything whereas the second class, they are roudy and loud, but at least they participate in some of the lesson. The only reason they are like this is because I don't speak Guangdongwha enough to yell at them and make them scared. If I try anything in english they just repeat it back.
During lunch I was so tired from the night before I didn't go to the gym. I came back here and slept for an hour hoping it would help my muscles. It did a bit. I also finished the first disc of the wedding DVD I am working on. I headed back to class, which was with my 6th graders that I already talked about.
There was one good point in the story. My face became the color of a tomato. I blushed pretty badly and couldn't stop giggling when I tried to speak to the students. I was going around students trying to get them to practice, "How's it going?" Asking them and they were responding. I came to this one girl, one of the actually good students in the class. She sits with her best friend, I also see them walking around together and looking at me when my head is turned. As soon as I look at them, they shy away, giggle, and then run. Well, today, I asked, "How's it going?" And she didn't say anything. But she then pointed at something in her book. On the lesson page was written, "loveing you". And I saw this...and i just turned red and couldn't stop turning red. All the kids started laughing and saying, "hong sic" (red color). I tried to look serious to try to stop the blushing but I couldn't and I just started giggling again. And some of the kids were laughing at the girl too, but not really. It also seemed that everytime I looked over there, I would blush and start giggling. I couldn't help it. The kids laughed hard. Oh well.
I hope she knows it could never work out between us. I mean...she's in 6th grade...and I am in......um...17th grade. Thats alot of grades. Besides being illegal, there is too much of a generation gap. :D
After school was done I had kindergarten. It was the day of the "10 Kid Spaz Class". Today wasn't too bad. I started trying to get them to understand "Simon Says..."...or in this case, "Phil Says...". I started using the gung fu I know during Simon Says. Its hilarious. They love it. How messed up is that, a white person teaching gung fu to chinese. I think that is very sad. Thanks to the party thats what it has come down to. The only really bad thing was one of the spazzes screamed as loud as he could into another spazz's ear. It made the other spaze cry and I yelled at the spazz that screamed.
After class was over I grabbed the bicycle to head home. As I was saying goodbye to other children and about to walk thru the gate, a mother was coming thru the gate with her 3 year old daughter. The daughter saw me and froze. Her lower lip started to tremble, I tried to walk thru the gate which brought me closer to her. She screamed lowed and hid behind her mother's legs. Then she started to bawl. She just started crying and wouldn't stop. I scared her. I hate making babies cry. I backed up to allow them to walk thru. By this time the mom and her daughter in her arms and the kid was crying. I went thru the gate and rode home.
On the way home, the bicycle brake for the front tire snapped. So, I need to get that fixed. Got home and I was planning on going to practice, but my legs still felt bad, so i stayed home and watch 1-Hour Photo. It was pretty good. I felt that the situation presented in the movie was much more creepy than the acting by Robin Williams. I mean, he was good. He just didn't make me cringe enuff.
I then did some more DVD work. Now I finished writing this and I am heading to bed.
Sleep well all.
However, today was pretty much a very good day until nighttime came along and thats where the bittersweet comes from. It was overcast yesterday and it hasn't rained in 2 months. So I am pretty much a fool for leaving my clothes on the clothesline to dry over nite. It rained and my stuff outside got all wet..including my gym clothes and a bath towel. I wasn't able to go to the gym because of it.
It was also surprisingly chilly. It seems to be around 17-18 degrees celsius. It was sort of a rude awakening but not too bad, since I am from Michigan.
I had class. Nothing spectacular happened, but it was fun. It makes me laugh...the chinese here in the south are panzies when it comes to cold weather. I am standing there teaching in a T-shirt and all the students are wearing winter coats and gloves. Its just a funny image. Time came for lunch and I headed home and did a bit of DVD work and grabbed a bite to eat. I then headed back to school on the bicycle.
6th grade class today went well. Nothing horrible to report. After the primary school finished, I biked home to take care of some things then headed out to kindergarten class. I was trying to teach the kids, DVD/CD/MP3. I figured they would know most of that already since they love DVDs and VCDs in this town. It was adorable to hear these 4-5 year olds say, "MP-3". So cute.
After that, I rode home and did some more stuff until I planned to head out to Lion/Dragon Dance practice. About 15 minutes later, John showed up and we played a round of pool. After that I hauled my booty over to practice. Its kinda sad that I was on a bike and I was passing people on motorbikes and scooters. I got to practice and started stretching.
This is where the story gets bittersweet. I was practicing what I have been taught by the head coach. Just practicing it n stuff. He came over and showed me some more. I picked it up almost immediately. I also noticed this really old guy walking around trying to look like he was watching everyone, but I saw him looking at me alot. I was noticing him as the head coach was instructing me on the new stuff. The old guy headed into the bathroom. As the head coach was watching me do some of the new stuff, the old guy came out and then started chatting to the headcoach about stuff. It was pretty obvious he was talking about me. I hope it was good.
Later on in the night, I got to control the dragon head. That thing is heavy. But I think I am getting the hang of it. After I sat down, the girl that translates for me asked me if I could join them in a Dragon Dance on Sunday morning at 9am. I was like sweet. But I have to work. Wait, this is for a cultural festival of sorts, and the government invited me to this, so I may not be working. Sweet. I may be able to join. I have to find out for sure though. I also asked who that really old guy was. I had a thought and the girl confirmed it. The really old guy was the head coach's teacher. I hope I don't offend him with my whiteness.
While I was sitting there trying to rest after something I will talk about in a bit, the old guy was walking by. He noticed me, stopped and smiled big and gave me a thumbs up. It was pretty kool.
So, why was I sitting there for awhile resting? Well, after I learned the new form stuff, I proceeded to practicing on the kicking exercise that the head coach gave me. It entails doing a leg sweep followed by a spinning kick to the head type deal and then into some stances. Well, me being an idiot, I forgot to stretch out one muscle group. Basically, I forgot to stretch out the butt/hip muscles. So, as I compressed to do the sweep and turn, I pulled a muscle in my butt. Its on the left side. Its that muscle in the divot of your butt cheeks, the outer part of your butt. I didnt want to damage it more so I had to sit out. Apparently, when you cross your legs, you use this muscle alot. I learned that. ouch. So, no gym for me tomorrow. I am just gonna relax it during lunch, go to practice at nite and take it easy.
As I was leaving practice I was saying goodbye to people. I went and said good-bye to the real old guy. I guess I surprised him because he jump back a bit when I walked up to him. He then got this huge rotted tooth smile and slapped his hands on both my shoulders and then made a hand motion to say, "Very broad shoulders, very strong", he then made a stance that I was working on earlier and he said, Han Hou! (Very Good!) and he seemed happy. I think I can safely assume that what he was saying to the head coach earlier was good.
I rode the bike home slowly not to aggravate the muscle. I got home and finished up some DVD work.
It was a good day mostly. I hope this pulled muscle won't keep me out for too long. I hope it heals fast. Now I am off to bed.
Got to relax today. Went to the gym. Etc. Got paid. sweet. However, there was almost trouble with Bond. They almost tried to screw me out of money since I missed classes on Sunday cause I was in Macao. They wanted to make sure I needed to go sunday or else they would withhold money from me. Don't try to screw me anymore Bond. I will go nuts on you.
I had to go to Macao with John today to leave and re-enter China because my VISA is 30 days stay. Retards. US and China relations...I HATE YOU! Wasting my money like that.. That's not right!
I don't really like Macao that much...I realized that today.
It was a gorgeous day. Its been chilly all week and then all of a sudden they day we go to Macao, its hot. Ugh. But it was beautiful. No clouds. The sun on the water. Very pretty. I took lots of fotos. I will post them soon. We just walked around.
We went to the Caloane Village. Since the public transportation is totally confusing in this city, I made a mistake and cause John and I to get off the bus at the wrong place. We eventually grabbed a taxi and it took us to the destination. It was about 4 miles away. Yeah. I made a mistake. Friggin Macao bus system.
We got to the village and we went into the catholic church and saw the chinese version of the Virgin Mary and Jesus. I got to scan that in. Its awesome. Walked around the village. Visited a couple temples and then we happened upon a grave yard. So we went around and looked at it. It was very interesting. We stopped at a resturant in the village to grab a cold drink and it took the lady about 15-20 minutes to get us a couple shakes. Freaks.
We then hopped a bus to walking street. Walked around. It was Police day. They had a bunch of people at stands and it was really crowded.
Speaking of crowded, the lines at the borders were packed. John never saw it so busy. Its prolly because the Macao Grand Prix is next weekend.
The Brazil resturant was closed. I did find a store sign with my chinese name, "Fei Long" (flying dragon). It was the Flying Dragon Overseas Trading Company. Gots me a foto. John went and bought some Tiger Balm (medicine for Mosquito bites - illegal in the US).
We tried to catch a cab back to the barrier and we couldn't snag one. So we went to a casino waiting line and waited about 30 minutes to get one. I hate this city. We were rushing against the clock to get thru the borders.
We got into Zhuhai around 745pm and got our bus tickets for 830pm. We then went into the local mall and bought some DVDs. I picked up:
1. Team America - awesome movie. I recommend you all to see it.
2. One Hour Photo - it was ok. I felt it didnt' live up to its potential
3. Iron Maiden "Rock in Rio" - all I have to say, is hardcore.
4. Sunshine of the Spotless Mind - great movie
5. Supersize Me - a requisite for all Americans
6. A chinese movie where they mix profesional wrestling with a resturant business. Very funny.
7. A chinese movie that sux. The only saving grace is Donnie Yen and Jackie Chan (who's in it for a couple minutes). It is crap. Oh...it stars Jackie Chan's son. Not as skilled as his father.
We got home and I went to bed. I was tired.
I had a pretty relaxing day. Just hung out and did some things. Worked on the DVD. I was very lethargic today. I don't know why. Still a bit sore from the Hong Quan practice.
Went to the Beer Gardens tonite. I got some chinese to say Cat Piss and Cat Sex instead of CHeers...it ruled. Very funny. They deserved it.
Yeah. Tonite was fun. First off, classes went ok. Nothing spectacular happened. After kindergarten I headed home. I then had to meet my school for a dinner put on by a couple of the parents of students. It was sports day today and they were trying to bribe the school. Friggin' chinese. But hey, I got a great free meal out of it. And of course, the chinese like to drink. So I had this great meal and I told people that I had to leave @ 730pm for Mandarin lessons at Bond. But NOO!! The chinese wouldn't let me leave without making me do about 5 shots of Bei-Ju with them. Damnit! I dont want to be drunk during my lesson.(it actually made the lessons very funny, cause I wouldnt stop asking questions) I said goodbye to my bosses in Gunagdonghua. That big fat guy that I told you about from Teacher's Day showed up as well. I was surprised. So, he made me do a shot with him as well. One guy decided to make me his brother. Great.
From there I bolted over to the Xiaolan Office for lessons. It was just John, Toby, and me. It was cool. I was a little tipsy from the Bei-Ju. I warned everyone that it was Chinese Culture that made me late and drunk. However, Lynn was just going over the packet we were given when I showed up back in August with words n phrases. She was giving us the proper tones and answering questions. But she wouldnt tell us any curse words so I had to give the ones I knew. She threw chalk at me. I guess I was being a bad student, but I wasn't completely all there....damn chinese. I also answered some questions that she was unable to. That Street Chinese book Chad gave me has taught me alot. It also taught me the dirty words. I am taking that book to class next friday.
After class was over I was heading gonna head out. John and Toby said to give them a call about 10pm to find out what we are doing. After I left the Xiaolan Office, I stopped by one of the classrooms. Clyde was celebrating the birthday of one of his students. They had cake and everyting. Selena, Lynn, and I stopped by. I used the chinese I knew, and the people all there understood and said good. Then I got mad with Lynn because she said I was terrible with chinese. They understood. That's all that matters. Ugh. She then laughed and said, "I am just trying to push you." Damn. From there I hopped home.
Rumi and Yumi showed up around 10pm and then we took taxis over to the Beer Gardens to meet up with John and Toby. It was just the five of us hanging out at the gardens. Just chatting. Somewhere around 12/1230, John and I went to the bathroom. Unfortunately I made the mistake of saying something in chinese and the chinese guy in the bathroom with us freaked out and started chatting us up. And following us around...with his pants unbuttoned and unzipped. So, we sat back down. Then the inevitable happened. That guy from the bathroom showed up with his posse and wanted to drink with us. And since we couldn't be rude, we had to stay. So there was alot of drunken english and chinese speaking. These guys were beginning to make me upset. They kept wanted me to drink and were being very forceful about it, but if I drank much anymore I would get sick. They couldn't understand that. So...that was the last straw. I drank a bunch of tea to flush my system a bit. Then I poored one more glass. I stood up and toasted everyone. However, instead of saying Gambei or Cheers, I said, "Cat Sex". All the chinese repeated happily, "Cat Sex!" AIYA! At this point, John laughed his ass off and I proceeded to squirt beer through my nose and almost choke on the alcohol. Serves you right.
It was getting late. it was around 3am and we needed to leave. The chinese were getting ready to leave. But a couple of the guys didn't want us to go so they just kept talking to us n stuff. Then a worker came over to say something or do something and one of the chinese guys at our table threw a bottle at his feet and yelled at him. Great way to kill the mood, jackass. After that, we bolted. As we were leaving though, crossing the street, one of the guys ran up to Rumi and John and babled for about 15 minutes. I have no clue what was going on. After that, I stumbled home. That walk never seemed longer.
CRAP!!! I almost forgot! I have to take care of my VISA on the 14th. Well, it will get me outta classes on Sunday. I need to exit every 30 days and come back in. It makes no friggin sense to me as why I have to do that. I have to go to either Macao or Hong Kong...and Macao is much cheaper to go to.
Well, now that you ask, Yes. I am happy right now. Finding this Gung Fu / Lion & Dragon Dancing has really raised up my spirits. Its great to just work hard and practice form work and sweat for 2 hours. I had an email conversation with Hartmut, my Deutsch Instructor from UM. He's hardcore. I also had an email conversation with Sensei Gary Dolce, my Shorinji Kempo teacher, who is equally hardcore. In both of our conversations, they mentioned that by putting myself on as much as an equal level with a group of chinese will help. For example, not being their teacher, or a tourist, but as a participant in a group learning things together. And I knew it would work, i just needed to find something, and now that I have this Lion/Dragon Dancing thing going on, I am fit as a fiddle. I also start Mandarin Lessons this friday. Lynn will be my instructor. BOND finally got off their asses and set up these lessons. Thats another good thing. Also...great news:
***Taiji Sifu Gabriel Chin's article "Can We Tell the Truth" has been published unchanged and complete. This long time goal was made a reality by Jess O'Brien in his book "Nie Jia Quan". Also included in the book is a lengthy interview with him. (and a bunch of fotos that I scanned and sent to him...Chad and I by the CUBE with Gabe may show up in some of the fotos....go check it out) So what are you waiting for? Go out and buy this book! There are many interviews with other masters from all over including Tim Cartmel. No gong fu library is complete without it!***
As some of you may know, Gabriel Chin is the ancient Chinese man that taught me Taiji & Qi Gong for the past....almost 4 years. He is amazing man who has lived thru amazing and dreadful times...and he has great stories. My favourite is how he got thrown into Taiwanese prison. Anywho...go out to Border's and buy it. It should be really good.
On with my day....
Well, it started out great because today is my day where I dont start classes till 10AM. It was great. I got to sleep in till 9AM. I was so tired from the nite before. That practice tired me out. My thighs are still sore from all the horse stances that I have been doing. You lose alot when not doing much stuff for 2 months. I have also been still going to the gym which has been aiding in my fatigue...as well as the kids. :D But its a good kind of fatigue.
The past two daze have been really hot and humid...man, it was cooling down, then it got all hot again. Sounds like Michigan. I got to class and sat under the ceiling fan for about 10 minutes to kool down and stop sweating.
I walk into my 3rd grade class and there is a ruckus. I go over to the otherside of the room really quickly and there are about 4-5 kids in a rumble. It turned out that one of the fat kids and the kid with cauliflowered ears were in fight and 2-3 kids were trying to hold back the fat kid from attacking the cauliflowered ears kid. While I was seperating them and trying to figure out what was going on. Kids were trying to tell me what was going on, but I can't understand these godless little meat-sacks.
So, while I was trying to take everything in, the two kids proceeded to try and throw each others books and bags and their contents everywhere and then the fat kid got an evil eye for the cauliflowered ear kid again and went on the offensive, this is where I stepped in. I grabbed the fat kid and threw him into the chair, he tried to get up and kick the other kid, but I stopped that by using the pressure points just above his collarbones. That kept him in his chair. Lucy, the teacher/enforcer of the class was pretty much clueless as to what was going on. She walked in after me and was just walking around mindless. After I had the fat kid pinned in the chair, thats when she started giving out authority. She took the fat kid downstairs and I proceeded to look at all the kids. I thought they would be stunned, but they were ready to get on with the lesson...so, I guess this sort of thing happens alot? The cauliflowered ear kid was still in the class and he seemed a little shaken up, but he was ok. Lucy came back and took him to the office as well. I guess they wanted to find out what happened. I don't know excatly what happened cause Lucy never told me.. I will find out tomorrow and let you know. But, what I think happened is this....
During the 10 minute break between classes, the cauliflowered ear kid may have said something to the fat kid which made him snap. I have watched the fat kid in class before...I think he may have some "issues". I don't want to make any rash judgements. But that's how I see it in my head. I will let you know tomorrow and see if I am right.
Getting on with it...the lesson, things went fine. The kids were kind of louder than usual. Then it was lunch time, so I headed to the gym. I made a quick stop at the sports shop where I bought the Taiji Sword and bought a couple of new gym shirts. I have been running thru all of mine quickly with this martial arts stuff at nite. So, I got a couple. The I need now is a new pair of work out pants. I got into the gym and I was still tired a bit from the nite before. My thighs, still sore. So i didnt do any bike or martial arts. And since it was humid today, my t-shirt that I put back on still had sweat marks on it from when I arrived. You know, there is nothing like stepping out of a shower and into a locker room with ceiling fans on full speed and then putting on a sweaty t-shirt. ITS AWESOME!! I headed out and grabbed some awesome potstickers from the place next door that I love. Also some pearl milk tea. MMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmm.......yummy.
I got back to school and I had 10 minutes before class. My day classes went fine excpet my 3rd lesson was canceled because they are having some sports day thing today and tomorrow. It ended up that half of my class was missing. Ivy decided to take over. While she was talking to the class about something, I was motioning to a boy by the window to throw a water balloon onto the students below. But he was too much of a panzy to do it. He hid it in his desk and I pestered him by Ivy's back to throw it. "Throw it!"...jerking my head in the direction of the window and wall. I kept doing it and staring him down, this was making a couple other kids who knew what was going on laugh out loud and clap. When this happened, Ivy turned to look at me. I was sitting there statuesque. Perfect example of gentleman-hood. When she turned back to the class, I returned to trying to convince the boy to throw the waterballoon. "Throw it!!! You little punk! Don't be a sissy!" Ivy would turn her head at me, and I was perfect as usual. I then said my goodbyes and tried to get the kid to throw it, but he wouldn't. What a punk.
Since my class was canceled I ran over to the drugstore to get some medicine/cream for these damn mosquito bites. These little pests have a hide-out in my room. I kill one, and another shows up 5 minutes later. Its bizarre. Its like "The Conservation of Mosquitos" in my room. So, I have a bunch of bites all over my legs and arms. And of course, since I haven't dealt with many mosquitos in many years, I have been itching alot as well. Which is bad. This oil stuff seems to work. It stops the itchy feeling.
After the drugstore I hopped a taxi to my kindergarten class. I had 30+ kids today and they were pretty good. Loud...but good. Its hard to keep the attention of 30+ kids when you are trying to teach something to them thru competition. Owen also brought gifts.
1. A care-package from my boy, Tony, in AA. He sent me a book and a DVD. So nice of him.
2. An invitation to some government cultural thing on Nov 21st. I am gonna go...who knows, maybe the Lion/Dragon troop is going to perform...who knows, maybe I will be in the show.
Came back here for a bit to do some stuff before shuffling off to practice. I got to practice, stretched, and started working out in my little corner. Just doing the forms the coach showed me and working on some other stuff from home. The coach showed up and showed me some more stuff. I was practicing that mostly until the girl that does some of the English interpretting for me came and grabbed me and took me to the group that was doing the dragon dancing. They wanted me to try out the head. Now, Looking at this, you don't think it was be heavy...this head was, and you have to whip it around..its tuff. i don't know the amount of weight the head is, but its at the end of the stick, so, moment of inertia plays the enemy here. After I watched them do it once, I tried. They then tried to show me the proper areas and how to old it. I got it down after a couple tries and I was whipping htat thing around, but it was really tuff. Fun but tuff.
I then went back to practice my form work some more. I then started working with a couple other guys. They were showing me some kicks and then we started screwing around. He showed me something which caused me to bust out the Capoiera which made them laugh but then I went into some break dance moves and their jaws dropped. I proceeded to teach about 5 chinese guys the basic 6-step do break dancing. It was highlarious. Time was up and I headed home.
Now I sit here at the computer typing in this journal entry after throwing my workout clothes in the wash and taking a well-needed shower....that warehouse is dirty.
Well, I gots to go. Its late.
Good nite.
I will type up more on this tomorrow as I am not in the best sahape to expalin it.
Ok. otoodles my nizzles.
-me
Ok. So I am typing this a day later. But I will type it as if I typed it last nite...without the drunkness.....
I just got back from a late nite dinner with the older crew of the Lion and Dragon Dance Troup. I think most of these guys were doing the Dragon. These are the guys that I think do the actual performances. I don't think any of the Lion Dancers are here. Well, none of the guys that do the pedistal lion dancing.
What happened was this. I went to practice this evening and worked my patoot off with the new forms and stuff the head coach showed me. I was drenched in sweat. Thats a good thing. As I was about to head out, the head coach called me and made a motion for eating. Then he motioned that a bunch of people were going out to eat. So i was like...sweet. They must really think I am stupid because it took about 10 people to keep telling me and motioning me to follow this one person. :D Just teasing. They were just trying to be helpful. So i followed this guy. We were on bikes and then some people on motorbikes caught up with us. I followed these people thru back streets and alleys. I had no clue where I was.
We got to this clearing and there was a resutrant. We got some tables together and sat around. About 20 of us were there. We all sat around chatting. Well, they all chatted and I sat there quietly and I really only spoke when the girl with english spoke to me. There was some funny things. I started singing, "Siu Lam Gung Fu Seng" and they loved it. All of us were older folks except for the head coach's son. He is about 9 and he is like, super skinny. I mean, he's skinny by chinese standards...very skinny. So, what do you think they call him? Fei Lo (Fat Man). He would go get the beer. He would run into the shop and come running out holding 2 bottles of beer bigger than his head. It was very humorus. I tried to explain to the girl that in the States, if you are under 18, its illegal to serve alcohol and illegal to drink under 21. Her eyes widened and she was surprised. That's freedom for you.
So, after we hung out for awhile and ate and drank, they asked if I knew how to get home. Nope. Not at all. I told them where I lived and they told me to follow so and so home. I got my bearings and then I was all good to ride home myself.
Riding a bike while tipsy is very interesting. You ride like you walk. Awkward and stumbly. I made it home safely and went to bed. Ahhh. What a nice nite.
As for the rest of my day, things went fine. Nothing huge to report.
I finally found gung fu in China! I went back to the warehouse where they practice Lion & Dragon Dancing. I arrived at 8pm when its supposed to start, but apparently thats when they open up the doors. About 15-20 minutes later the coach arrived. So, I spent about 15-20 minutes watching people practice and a couple people trying to ask me if I was here to practice. They didnt know much English, but what they said was good, and I know they could have understood if they just tried. So i hung out for a few minutes and then the coach's wife took me over to the area where the new guys are practicing the Lion Dance basics. She said something to the basics coach, which I think was, "Take this round-eye and teach him the stretches and show him some San Da". Why she said San Da in there and why he kept saying it as well elludes me since there was no practice throughout the whole night in San Da...thankfully because San Da is crap. "Lessons in brutality" I call it.
But anyway, this guy took me over to the stretching area and kept talking to me in Guangdongwah. I kept telling him mmmsec-tang. (I don't understand). I motioned that I will watch him and he nodded. I know how frustrating this can be, so I tried my best to follow his lead. However, for some stupid reason, all chinese like to bounce in their stretches, even the Shaolin Monks. I have no clue as to why. Its one of the most dangerous things you can do when you stretch. I was stretching and he grabbed my body and tried to force me to bounce. Whenever he tried to bounce me in my stretch, i told him, "bu hou" (no good) or just "bu". I think this confused him. I tried to illustrate why..I stretched normally, said "hou". I stretched with the bounch and said "bu hou". He proceeded to say some more stuff in Cantonese to help my stretch, I was like, "mmmsec-tang". He got frustrated and grabbed the nearest kid and told him to help me stretch.
This kid, prolly freshman in highschool, tried to get me to bounce as well. "CUT IT OUT! DO YOU WANT ME TO TEAR MY MUSCLES!" I did the same to him and this prolly frustrated him as well. When you bounce in a stretch and feel pain, thats not a good thing. Retards. The way I see it, Bouncing in your stretch started as a bastardization of a real good method of stretch which is stretching to your limit, holding for about 3 seconds then releasing and then stretching just a bit beyond that last limit. You gain flexibility this way. However, you need time for the muscle to warm and loosen up, bouncing just forces it. Bouncing is based on the idea that muscles are like elastic. Not true.
Anywho, enuff of that. I prolly just made no sense and Kineseaology Majors will correct me. Bring it on, Gym Teachers!
Back to my story. This kid got frustrated and was able to snag a girl that knew some English. She asked, "Do you want to learn Chinese Gung Fu?" I said, "No. I want to continue. I have been learning for 4 years. I just want to watch." She said a couple things then left. This freshman kid then snagged another kid much younger than him. This kid was one of the Lion Head dancers. He was small and he was wearing the pants. A Lion Tail needs to be big to pick up the head person. You have got to see some of the stuff they are doing on pedestals. Its really kool. The freshman kid told the Lion Head kid that I don't speak any Guangdongwah, I caught that much, and the Lion Head kid said, "WHAAAA!"
So this younger kid starts doing some stretches with me...its the same damn stretch. And he tried to get me to do the bouncing. CUT IT OUT! Do something different. About this time, the head coach showed up to show me some form work, get me started on Hong Quan and the Hung Gar Hard Style Qi Gong.
I dunno if the head coach was just playing along and placating me or if he was really impressed with me. He would show me a move or part of a form and I would do it right away. He sure looked surprised. I told you guys I knew what I was doing. I aint just any old goofy looking roundeye. Thats what you get for assuming...You made an "ASS" out of "U" and...MING "The Merciless".
So, this head coach taught me all of the Hung Gar Qi Gong and he seemed impressed. I have done this one before. Started doing it the summer after I started martial arts and I also practiced a bit of it with the Shaolin Monk in Las Vegas. So, I just needed a refresher. He also had me practice a couple bits of what I think was Hong Quan. Again, he seemed surprised. I continued to practice this stuff for the whole time. He would watch and correct some things and showed me things. He didnt speak much, but he didnt have to. I just watched. And so did all the chinese kids in the Lion Dance Basics....they were all, "WHAAAAA!?!?! Gweilo doing gung fu. Amazing. I will not stop staring because I am close minded."
So, I practiced this for awhile. And at the end of class the head coach was trying to tell me something. I believe he was trying to tell me to, "Maintain class". So, I said, "Lei-ah", pointing at the floor of the gym. And he said, "Hai, hai." Yes Yes. He wants me to keep coming. I think he is impressed.
I am gonna go tomorrow nite if I am free and I am not in pain. My hands were sore from doing the bridge hand all nite during the Qi Gong. Oh well.
I hoped on the bike and headed home. I got back and now I am typing this up. Good nite all.
Oh, more about my day. My students today were terrible. I had my usual morning 4th graders that are usually really good, but today, no one was listening and I had to yell at them a couple times. It really pissed me off. I went to the gym and had a good work out. Then headed back to the school to catch a ride to the Primary School English Play competitions. There were some really kool plays and some disturbing plays, like the one about Angel Wings - this kid was getting picked on in the locker room because he had 2 long scars on his back, the teacher explained that this is where his Angel wings will come out of in the future. Um.....what? I guess you had to be there.
There was some kids dressed up as Gogo, the character used in the books to teach English. It was adorable. And a bunch of other stuff. There was, "Little Red Hood", not Little Red Riding Hood, but Little Red Hood. Go figure.
I took my camera to video tape our play, but I had to go to kindergarten before my students went on. Damn. Luckily the computer teacher was there to video tape it as well. I need ot borrow the tape.
Well good nite.
Yuppers. Just got back from the Lion Dance practice/lessons that I discovered this weekend. I went with Salena (who's English is just a bit better than my Cantonese) to watch and discuss issues with the teacher. And of course she couldn't express herself to me and she couldn't understand me. We had to call Lynn constantly. I still dont really understand why she was sent to go with me. Don't get me wrong, Salena is great and efficient, its just hard to understand each other some times. According to this guy, I need to learn the whole Hong Quan Form before learning Lion Dancing....um excuse me... No I don't. I learned it once before - I just forgot it and I have done much more physcially demanding/intense forms since then as well. I know my stances after four years of constant martial arts practice. Yes, I do need a refresher on Hong Quan (red fist) but I can do that as I learn lion dancing. I am only gonna be in this scum-hole of a town for 4 more months, I want to learn as much as possible.
Its gonna be tough doing this though since no one there speaks English...well, most of the other students are middle and highschool so they know some english, but really don't. I had a pretty good conversation with the teacher's daughter. She could hold a basic conversation pretty well. I confused her a couple times.
Other than that, all I did today was go to the gym and clean up my room. I washed the floor with bleach water to remove dirt and germs from the destruction of bugs the night before. I aslo did some DVD work. Its coming along slowly, unfortunately. I need to get this done to start on another thing I want to do.
Good nite all.
killing giant spiders that freak the crap out of you when you are typing on your computer. I was just sitting here looking at The Onion and giggling. Then i look up and see this giant spider just scury from behind my window blinds across the wall.
AAAAAAH! This thing was big.
I tried to throw a cup at it and hit it, but he was evading that and headed back to the drapes. So i pulled out my sword and started smacking the drapes. I knocked it down onto the sill apparently. I either wounded it or another jump out and ran across the wall. I proceeded to wack that one down from the wall but he was still going. I tried to stab it, but these damn flexible swords don't stab at all. So it scuried under my chair. I flipped it over and he was sitting underneath it and I wacked him.
I dunno if this thing is poisonous or not. But i dont want that thing crawling over my bed at nite. icky.
Ok. Before you say that I shouldn't judge or I shouldn't talk trash...you don't know this guy. You would totally write about this if you met this guy. This boy has got a mouth on him. He is very inconsiderate and says some horrendous things. And it is not a cultural thing either. He offends and pisses of chinese as well.
1. He invites himself everywhere. Out of the two parties I have attended, none of us have invited him, but he sees the invites at English Corner and comes.
2. Makes as though he knows everything.
3. Touches inappropriately. "Phil, you have strong muscles...wow, let me feel." STOP IT!
4. Puts his nose in business that he shouldn't. I have heard multiple times, "Phil, I read your travel agency complaint letter." -Tony, why have you read it? Its not any of your business. Peter piped in, "Becuase he was in the Xiaolan Office when he shouldn't have been and reading things he shouldn't have been."
5. Sexually harasses women. He went up to Suzannah and said this, "Hi. I will take you out on a nice romantic dinner. Afterwards we will go to an expensive room alone." Suzannah was standing there with a dropped jaw. And he proceeded to say, "Can I touch you?" NO NO NO NO NO!
Sean talked to him today at English Corner and asked what he said to Suzannah, Tony told him. Sean said, "DUDE! You dont say that to women at all, Chinese or English or any nationality. Thats just not right." Tony's response was along the lines that since western women are sexually liberated and will sleep with anyone then all he has to do is ask and pay for the date. "Not just anyone, Dude. And certainly not you."
6. He has been harrassing Selena and I am pretty sure she has made it clear to him that she does not want his advances. And I got to see just how bad it was today at the Xiaolan Office. I also saw something at the Halloween Party. At the Party, he went up behind her and covered her eyes with his hands and said, "Guess who!?" Selena couldn't guess at first until she felt his face and glasses with her hands. When she realized, she screamed really loud. I laughed not thinking of it. Then it was put into perspective Sunday when I saw him at the office talking to her and trying to rub her shoulders while she was working. She was obviously irritated and I tried to help her out by asking her to come with me and Lynn to the Sports shop to check for Lion Head/Dancing info. She was busy doing some data entry, but I am sure she wanted to come. But the worst was when Tony piped in, "Oh, she is busy doing work, and I am working my magic." He turned to look at her, my jaw dropped and I looked at Lynn and she was laughing painfully, and then i caught a quick glimpse of Selena's eyes, "HELP ME!!!" She sounded like "The Fly" (awesome movie by the way) "HELP ME!!! HELP ME!!!!!"
After awhile, as Lynn and i left the sports shop with good news about possible lion dance instruction and gung fu instruction, Selena called and asked Lynn to meet up with her to go shopping. Her explanation... "I needed to get away!"
I will write more on his shenanigans when I hear of more.
http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=573&e=2&u=/nm/canada_usa_dc
Americans Flock to Canada's Immigration Web Site
Fri Nov 5, 2:22 PM ET
Oddly Enough - Reuters
By David Ljunggren
OTTAWA (Reuters) - The number of U.S. citizens visiting Canada's main immigration Web site has shot up six-fold as Americans flirt with the idea of abandoning their homeland after President Bush (news - web sites)'s election win this week.
"When we looked at the first day after the election, Nov. 3, our Web site hit a new high, almost double the previous record high," immigration ministry spokeswoman Maria Iadinardi said on Friday.
On an average day some 20,000 people in the United States log onto the Web site, www.cic.gc.ca -- a figure which rocketed to 115,016 on Wednesday. The number of U.S. visits settled down to 65,803 on Thursday, still well above the norm.
Bush's victory sparked speculation that disconsolate Democrats and others might decide to start a new life in Canada, a land that tilts more to the left than the United States.
Would-be immigrants to Canada can apply to become permanent resident, a process that often takes a year. The other main way to move north on a long-term basis is to find a job, which requires a work permit.
But please spare the sob stories.
Asked whether an applicant would be looked upon more sympathetically if they claimed to be a sad Democrat seeking to escape four more years of Bush, Iadinardi replied: "There would be no weight given to statements of feelings."
Canada is one of the few major nations with an large-scale immigration policy. Ottawa is seeking to attract between 220,000 and 240,000 newcomers next year.
"Let's face it, we have a population of a little over 32 million and we definitely need permanent residents to come to Canada," said Iadinardi. "If we could meet (the 2005) target and go above it, the more the merrier."
But right now it is too early to say whether the increased interest will result in more applications.
"There is no unusual activity occurring at our visa missions (in the United States). Having someone who intends to come to Canada is not the same as someone actually putting in an application," said Iadinardi.
"We'll only find out whether there has been an increase in applications in six months."
The waiting time to become a citizen is shorter for people married to Canadians, which prompted the birth of a satirical Web site called www.marryanamerican.ca.
The idea of increased immigration by unhappy Americans is triggering some amusement in Canada. Commentator Thane Burnett of the Ottawa Sun newspaper wrote a tongue-in-cheek guide to would-be new citizens on Friday.
"As Canadians, you'll have to learn to embrace and use all the products and culture of Americans, while bad-mouthing their way of life," he said.
Got up this morning for Guzhen teaching. I taught two classes to little kids. It was fun. They actually pay attention and try. Amazing. I played around with some of them during the break. Picking them up and throwing them. They love it.
Got done about 1030am and then we hopped a cab and Toby and I headed to English Corner while Suzannah headed home. I chatted with a couple adults and children. One of the adults name was "Swallow"...as in the bird. She told me...and of course...I was thinking of something else.
I played some Sidewalk Ping Pong...ping pong without a table on the sidewalk...with this little kid. His English was pretty good. I was also doing some Shorinji Kempo Techniques with him. That drew a crowd. He asked if I liked Basketball, I said no...its stupid. I then asked him if he liked gung fu and he said yes. I asked, "Do you practice?" He said, "No". I proceeded to teach him a lesson on why he should practice. I whooped his ass. That's right. There is nothing that makes you feel better than beating up on little people.
From there, Sean and I headed to the Wooden Chair for lunch. Some nice eggs & tomato and rice. With some green Veggies. We were chatting. He mentioned that he went with Suzannah on Friday to a place to eat. In this area, they saw people doing Gung Fu and Lion Dancing. So, instinctively I got excited. Apparently this place is by Viasystems, the place where Moses and I interviewed and where Suzannah is teaching. WTF! Why didnt she tell me before. She knew I was looking for gung fu. I mean...I complain about it everyday. More to talk about this in a few moments. but read on for now.
Sean and I went to this trendy clothes shop after lunch. On the way there we were walking by another clothes store and we caught this 3-5 year boy looking under the skirt of a child mannequin. We laughed our asses off! "Good practice, boy! Good practice! That will come in handy! Thats the way to go!" Ha ha.
We got to the trendy shop. The shirts were highlarious. I wanted to buy them all. But tooo expensive. They had some bizarre things. I bought a green sweat shirt with a front zipper. It has the adidas stripes on the arms. But it has the Campbell Soup can on the left pocket area saying something about trying to search for food. Makes no sense. I needed it.
Then Sean headed home and I headed home. I had to relax a bit before going to my new 300PM Kindergarten class with that adorable 4 year old I met at English Corner last week. Her name is Daisy and she is a genious. So, i got to the school around 250PM. I stopped by the Xiaolan Office to say hi and get Lynn who was gonna help me. Tony was there harrassing Selena. I need to write a lone journal article on Tony. He totally deserves one of his own. He is messed up.
I started the class. Right off I was irritated because the kids in the class were from 4 years old - 7 years old. You have a girl that is just starting kindergarten, a kid who is in it, and a kid who is too old for it. First off, the games that work with the younger kids doesnt work with the older ones. Luckily though, there were only 3 kids. And the one that was 5 years old was being a spaz and his mom took him out to discipline him. So it was just me, Daisy, and Jay (the 7 year old). I expected Jay to know everything which he did, however, Daisy knew just about the same. I was totally impressed. I introduced new material to her and she learned it like that. And she did it with an adorable cuteness. I want to steal her and take her home with me.
After class ended I took Lynn to this little sports shop that I discovered two nights before on the way home from the Ritz Resturant. This place had the Lion Heads and equipment. So, I had Lynn ask about it. And the lady gave me the card of the teacher and they are the ones that Sean and Suzannah saw out by Viasystems. 150 Kwai/month. Damn! I am going to check it out Monday evening. I sure hope this is good. I really hope. I am excited. I may get to learn Lion Dancing. I have always loved it. Soooooo cool.
After that, Lynn and I met up with Selena because she needed an excuse to escape Tony's harrassment. They went shopping and I went to the Shengya DVD shop to look for the Monkey King DVDs. I asked in Putongwah, "Ma la wong dai Er" (Monkey King II). Unfortunately they didnt understand my Putongwah like the other store did (but didnt have it). Since I didnt know the Cantonese of the character, I had to perform the Monkey King Stance in the DVD shop. They laughed at me, but they knew what I was talking about. Thats all that counts right? So I picked up the DVDs and headed home.
I am now at home about to get ready to go out to dinner with my schoolteachers. One of them gave birth to a boy last week and we are going to celebrate. And coincidentally, Peter's Headmaster of his school, well, his wife gave birth to a boy last week as well. And we are all going to the same resturant for dinner. I wonder if its the same couple. ;-)
I need to hop in the shower real quickly. Add more later.
Well, I am back and getting ready for bed. I thought I may just finish this entry up. Coco came to pick me up on her scooter while I was rushing to get ready...i was ironing my shirt. I wore a nice shirt since this is a special occasion. We got there and the food...was just superb. So much stuff. It irks me to no end that the chinese constantly eat, constantly eat fatty and sugarry foods, waste so much, and are soooo damn skinny! Aiya. It makes you made. Well, in a couple of generations the asian fatless gene may lose potency and die out and they will turn into Americans! MWHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAH A HA HA HAH AH AH HA HA!!!! 60% of your population will be obese!!!! JUST WAIT!!! AAAAAH HA HA HA HA HA HAH AH AH HA!!!!
The new parents were stopping by and toasting each at each table. The dad was drinking bei-ju (sake * 100) and the mom was drinking water. The dad's face was totally red and he was totally blitzed. The party ended when half of Xiaolan blacked-out. Yeah, Half the city lost power. I dont know how. I mean, jeez. You think it was an air-raid or something. It would be like in that movie, "1941" where there are Zoot Suit Riots outside the USO show and everyone has to aid in the taking out of lights in downtown L.A. because they have mistaken two US Warplanes as Japanese Zeros. That scene ruled. So Coco took me home.
I got back and Moses and Amy were watching "The Clearing". Talk about a crappy movie. The end sucked so badly. Thankfully I only watched 30 minnutes of it. I then popped in my Monkey King movies. Talk about totally awesome and totally messed up. Its to long to explain, but it involves Stephen Chow (star of Shaolin Soccer) as the Monkey King, he time travels, and lies to the women he loves. Very funny very bizarre.
I was watching it when Peter and some chinese people showed up. They were supposed to be here just for a few moments, but they got sucked into this chinese classic film and stayed the whole way thru. And now I am typing. I am chatting with Deor as well. Well, goodnite all.
So, don't freak out. I heard about this after I woke up. I talked to Peter about it. Apparently some guy last nite was murdered in Xiaolan. I heard it thru the grapevine. Peter heard it thru one of his students whose father works for the government. I was like, wow, thats kinda creepy. I haven't heard anything since, but its possibly tied to the Triads. I mean, they most likely run the prostitution, drugs, and the dance clubs in ShiQi and in Xiaolan...all the one dance club. About 6 months ago, some guy in ShiQi was decapitated at night club...during night club hours. That totally reeks of triad involvement.
Today was my day off and i just hung out, went to the gym with Peter.
Lynn had come over and got my AC fixed and I helped her with some of her Translation assignments. I then headed out to dinner with some friends and went to Long Shan Park. The big park. They got a little lake and this huge lighted pagoda. So cool. You can see the whole city. Pretty impressive.
I then headed home and went to bed.
My first class was canceled today. Nothing special really happened at school. Had good classes today and kindergarten went well. I also went to the gym.
The cool part was Peter and I went to the Ritz Resturant, this non-chinese food restuarnt. Its run by a HK guy. And its surprisingly good. However, it reeks of Chinese cheesy-ness. The place looks like its class from the outside and at a quick glance on the inside. However, you get up closer, and you see that everything is made from crappy materials and stuff is dirty. The bathroom was a perfect analogy. It had the idea and look to be super classy, but then you look closer and it was dirty and made crappily. Next time I am there I will take a foto. The food is very good though. They have this piano-woman playing the same 8 songs over and over again...and she is really bad. Constantly makes mistakes and can't stay on time. Good entertainment.
On the way back home we drove by a sport shop in which i saw some Lion Heads hanging on the wall. I was so excited. Tomorrow before I head to the gym I am stopping there to find out more!
Headed back to the house and just did some DVD work. Went to bed.
You know that scene in Kindergarten Cop where the Bad Guy is walking thru the school with the Vice-Principal looking at the different classrooms, but he is really looking for his son Dominick? Well, they arrive at Arnold's room and he is beseiged by little kids...like a dog pile on Arnold. Well, that happened to me today in Kindergarten. Well, not the part with the bad guy, but the part with the dogpile. I was teaching for about 40 minutes and we had a bathroom break and most of the kids went to the bathroom. However, the remaining kids stayed to play with me. I lifted two kids up with each arm and all of a sudden, about 20 kids mobbed me and were grabbing my legs and punching me playfully wanting me to pick them up. I was picking a few of them up and throwing them around. They loved it. It was making me happy. Lynn was my assistant today and she was giggling non-stop. She said, "Aiya! You are spoiling the kids!" And I responded, "I know."
I continued to do it. Until the real kindergarten teacher/enforcer returned. She looked angry because all the kids were laughing and having fun, so you could think of her as the Bad Guy from Kindergarten Cop. I was telling the kids, "Hurry up, sit down! You don't want to get into trouble!! Hurry hurry!" So they sat down and I proceeded to finish the class.
Other stuff... class started at 10am today. Then I headed ot the gym after one class. That was good. Some kids are performing a play in a contest on Tuesday morning...The Three Little Pigs. I have helped out a bit, but not much. I was really impressed. It was done well, they sounded good, and they looked adorable. But they got their costumes in. So awesome. I am gonna videotape the performance. I can't wait.
Today wasn't the best of times. The kids today were irritatting, especially the 6th graders. I had some fun, but lots of frustration. I had to send another 6th grade kid to the front of the room for saying the "F-word". I made a couple troublemakers stand in front of the class and recite a poem.
By the time I got to Kindergarten I was already tired and frustrated. It was the 10 Kid Spaz Class today and they wouldnt stop yelling and shouting. Running all over the place. I was so tired and frustrated and it seemed that things started to get all dreamlike in away. The shouting didnt help. There is no way to control these little energy-filled meat sacks.
About 5 minutes before class was over, I was going thru "Head, Shoulders, Knees, & Toes" to teach some body part names. And the kid that reminds me of my bizaro self when I was a kid was running around and not paying attention. When I went down to do the "knees & toes" part of the song, He ran by me and jumped with all his might and he sent his head shooting right into my nose as I was bending over into his head. CRACK!!!
OOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!! CLASS IS OVER GET OUT!!!! GET OUT NOW! BYE! GO! LEAVE! GO HOME! The kids were silent and worried. And Bizaro-Phil looked really nervous and sad...not knowing what to do. The kids were still hanging around and I told Owen to tell them that class was over. Owen was clueless on what to do as well. I hate that class. And when i refer to him as Bizaro-Phil, I mean it in every sense of the name. I'm American, he's Chinese. I'm a Capitalist, he's a Communist. I have light blue eyes, he has black eyes. I'm big, he's small. I'm white, he's...off-white. I am clean shaven, he has a goattee. And yet there is an odd similarity between the two of us....freaky.
As I was packing up, a kindergarten teacher/enforcer came in with Bizaro-Phil and he apologized. I felt bad that he was upset, but he needs to learn. After he left the 4-year old wiz girl showed up. She came running up to me and hugged my leg. So adorable. The pain in my nose wilted away. I chatted with her a bit and she headed out with her grandma. I then took off.
I headed home and I am just spent right now. No more doing stuff tonite. Ugh.
I have been watching the polls coming in all day. I always have hated Ohio....and Florida. It figures that they both screw up two really important elections in a row. Later.
Make sure you go to the polls today. All of you. Vote for someone other than Bush & Kerry because neither of them is fit to lead our country. We need some decent canidates for once. These assholes are ruining everything.
Other than that. My day was ok. Classes weren't all that great. The material was just so boring today and it was hard to do anything with it. Man, tomorrow is gonna suck with the 6th grade class. I will smack them all.
Went to the gym and tired myself out. I fell asleep on my desk inbetween classes. Wow.
During one of my classes a kid farted. It was a SBV because I didnt hear it. I went over to their side of the room trying to get them to repeat some of the words I was teaching and about 4 kids were plugging their noses and one was flapping his book. I looked puzzled. I was in mid-sentence when I realized why they were plugging their noses..."Why are you guys....." and I proceeded to snicker and more and more kids started to plug their noses and I was the only one giggling and then it grew and I couldn't stop laughing while I was trying to teach the lesson. The kids started opening the windows and I turned on the cieling fans. The funny thing is that the students didn't find the fart or situation funny at all, but they were sorta laughing at me because I was laughing while trying to teach. All in all, i was the only one laughing. I think it was one of the fat kids. It seemed from the layout of the plugged noses when I first noticed them, he was the epicenter. I found it really funny.
Oh, I also sent a 4th grader in my 2nd class to the front of the room for brandishing both barrels. But thats not as bad ass what I had to do in my 1st class of 4th graders. One of the boys in the front of the class said, "Fuck you" a couple times, for no reason. Just outta the blue...and in a voice like he didnt know what it meant. But what was worse was that the girl sitting next to him, who is super cute and is one of my favourite students decided to repeat it. Man, these kids will do anything someone tells them too. I hated to do it because I knew neither of them knew what it really meant, so i dragged both of their desks to the front of the room.
Whenever I send a kid to the front of the room, the rest of the students start chanting, "GOODBYE!"
man, talk about messing with you psychologically. Whoa...I just had a bit of Deja Vu right there. Freaky.
The rest of the day I spent chilling and doing some needed shopping.
Don't forget to vote.
So, today was my day off and I headed to the gym around 1130am to meet Jolleen. She was gonna help me get a 4 month membership. We got there and negotiated a 4 month membership for 450 kwai. Pretty good deal. I also got a personal locker. No more luggin tons of crap. I proceed to work out for awhile. It was great. Getting back into my routine. I chatted with John about the party last nite since I thought they all went. No one went. They all assumed that it would suck. And of course, they made asses out of themselve. Apparently it wa a blast. I dunno why they dislike the scene in ShiQi. There are fun things. They are just cocky sometimes. ;-) Just kidding, I love 'em. Its understandable, some of the crew in ShiQi tend to like to party with illegal substances and thats just not cool. I hope the cops bust them up.
So, I was saddened to hear this, but not too bummed since I had a blast at my party. That was a rockin good time. See the fotos and journal entry.
What else happened, oh, after working out, I grabbed some food at this awesome small shop. For 3 kwai, you can get 10 jiao-tze, steamed dumplings......SOOOOO GOOODD! they aslo have these noodle dishes for 3 kwai. This place rocks. Great food, super cheap prices.
Then I ran across the path of many motorcycles on the street to Sheng-Ya DVD shop where I was seduced by the Dark Side and purchased the new Star Wars Special Edition DVDs for a total of 33 kwai, which is ruffly $4US. AWESOME! They look gorgeous. There are some things that were done to them that pissed me off, but little things that a guy like me (psycho star wars fan would get pissed at). Things like changing Boba Fett's voice to the guy who played Jango Fett, because Boba was a clone of Jango...which for the record irrtiated me. Lucas aslo screwed up more things. He re-did the Conversation with the Emporer in The Empire Strikes Back. Ugh. Oh, and Anakin's ghost at the end of Return of the Jedi is no longer Bernard Shaw, but that panzy they picked to play Anakin in the first 3 movies. I haven't seen what they did to Star Wars: A New Hope yet. But all my irritations with the Special Editions from 1997 still hold....like Greedo shooting first. WTF!!!!!!
The rest of the day was spent on lesson preparation and screwing around.