Phil and Red's Excellent Adventure

I woke up at 645AM today so i could shave and get ready for the festivites. I had my vid-camera batteries all charged. I had some tapes. My digital camera is all charged up. I'm ready. I get to the Bond office at 830AM. Apparently someone told John that it was formal, so he showed up in a suit. I realized once we were there that it was formal. No one told me. We got in the Bond van and we headed out to the park area. The place was busy. We got out underneath the makeshift entrance gate. Its like this plastic or papermache gate. Very cheesy. Check out the fotos. Apparently this festival takes place every year, but on a much smaller scale. But every 10 years they go all out with it. It was quite impressive.
We walk thru this thing and past the entrance to Longshan Park. Its very pretty this early in the day. We head to the new park where the festival will be taking place. Lots of people. We arrived at the entrance after walking around cluelessly for about 20 minutes. There is a registration table and a red walking carpet. We are government guests so we get to see the full show instead of just the parade that everyone else will see. This area is roped off and there are hundreds of Chinese already lining up behind the ropes. So, i am walking down this red carpet after registering, and I took some fotos of the people behind the ropes. Very odd experience. I guess i could chalk it up to movie stars in Hollywood...without all the screaming and throwing of underwear. Crazy.
We walk towards the sitting area and get our seats for the introduction and kickoff of the festival. There was this big pagoda and seats for the government members to sit around. I guess its called the Daus, or Dais. Whatever. Anyway. We got our seats right in front on the right side. Luckily this is a perfect place to videotape the parade that shows up later. It was about 920AM and we had 40 minutes until the speeches started. There was this chinese gong and drum band playing. Very loud, but cool. Since we had time to kill I went around taking pictures and stuff and looking at the stuff. There were two groups doing some Lion dancing. I saw that one of the groups was my running crew, so I took off over there to say hi. The old guys friend was there and I said hello and said "hi"to some of the others that I see alot. I took a bunch of fotos of them. I was about to leave to check some other stuff out when the headcoach showed up. He was happy to see me and I showed him that I was representing with the School T-shirt that he gave me the night before. He laughed. He had to go do something so I headed out with John to something that made my mouth drop.
John introduced me to Maria, his principal, and we walked to this area that looked like they had these floats with puppets on them...however, when we got closer, they weren't puppets. They were little kids! These kids were dressed up in chinese traditional outfits with Beijing Opera style make-up and in poses as well. From what I could tell is that there was a framework on these things in which the kids would sit, but their clothes and everything else made it look like they were defying physics. For example, there was this one kid holding an umbrella and on that umbrella stood to more children. I think there is a framework leading from the kid on the bottom up thru the umbrella up to the legs of the children. I have never seen anything like this. You really need to look at the pictures. They are just amazing. I can't really explain it. But, if you notice in some of the fotos there are birds that the kids are standing on...those aren't fake. They are real. Real birds were tied up with wire and tape and attached to the float. This was also kind of shocking. That would never fly in the states. I mean, members of a frat in Davidson College, giving props to my cousin, were busted for killing a goose. I was like a smack in the face...just like one chinese guy did to the dove...smacked it in the face a bunch of times.
After those awesome floats we headed back to the seats and I told Moses and Amy to go check them out. I then saw Hirano-San...the japanese man I met on my Beijing Tour. I asked to take a foto with him. Kool. I then sat down and more people started showing up. The crowd gathered and it was time to start. There I sat, with Robert (the new guy who is from New Zealand, not England) Mark Amy (england), and Toby (england). The government people started sitting down and getting stuff ready. Robert made a joke that they Dais/Daus looked like a UN meeting. I added more to the joke by saying, "I wonder if they will be as ineffectual as the UN"...that received a couple giggles from Robert and Mark. But not Toby. Toby decided to get into another arguement during the festivities. "And who made it so? The US by not following UN procedure." SHUT UP, TOBY! YOU FRUSTRATE ME TO NO END! So then I piped in, "No, the UN has been ineffectual for a long time." Mark asked, "Is this the time and place to discuss this guys, I don't think so." I agreed and stoppded but then Toby decided to add more and say that the UN does alot and he prefers the UN to "your lot - International Corporations is all the US Gov really is..." and they kill people. "[The US] has turned Iraq into a graveyard."
"EXCUSE ME!?! America has not turned Iraq into a graveyard. Saddam turned Iraq into a graveyard. And would continue to do so. Americans do not target civilians and murder them for no reason." I decided not to add anything about the horrids of Abu Garrahb prison and the like to prevent another line of Anti-US sentiment from Toby.
Toby then added a comment, which is a good point, I agree somewhat with, but I think its a stretch, "Let's look at the people who have defied the League of Nations and UN...Stalin, Hitler, a couple other names I forgot, and Bush". Good point - I said. However, I dont' know if Bush and Hitler could be compared that easily.
I then finished the arguement by saying, "If the UN was effective in anyway why is there genocide in Darfur, why was there Genocide in Bosnia-Herzogovina, why didnt the UN do anything for Somalia, why is Milosevic still in court and not in jail, why didnt they ever stop Saddam, why doesn't the UN stop all the murder and killings in Africa, why couldn't they stop the U.S. from invading Iraq, why didnt they do anything to stop Al Queda, why didnt they stop the Taliban from performing crimes against humanity, why don't they do anything to stop all the injustice that they should be preventing. All they do is talk and recommend things. They come out and condemn actions with speeches and words, but when do they act? And when they do act, whats the use of sending a handful of UN Peacekeepers to a Civil War. And weapons inspectors!!! If people want to build a nuclear bomb, they can hide it! What good are inspectors gonna do?" Its all bureaucratic B.S. This ended the arguement. Thankfully. I can take much more of him. I wonder how many comments I am gonna have on that rant. :D
The speeches by the local government began. There were five speeches by respected member of the government and community leaders. I found it kinda ironcic. Almost all speeches mentioned Dr. Sun Yat Sen and his famous quote, "Dare to be the first." Yet all four speeches contained that phrase. It was obvious none of these people "dared to be first."
After those speeches were over. The released the balloons. Man, there was alot of balloons. I hope these balloons don't kill any dolpins...(helium balloons, when they start losing helium and fall back to the Earth, sometimes over oceans...some dolphins have died trying to eat them). After they released the balloons they had a 6 cannon salute with confetti. After all the confetti was in the air, it looked like a swarm of locust. Check out the fotos. Amazing. After that the parade began. I was in prime seating. I think the kids were first then some dragons showed up. My vid-camera got knock almost out of my hands by a passing dragon. That should be interesting footage. THere were lots of Lion Dance troups. There was some group of ladies wearing pink and playing a drum. I was videotaping it all. I was waiting for my lion dance crew and they finally showed up and I was surprised. They were the last of all lion troups. And there was sooo many of them. I never realized how many of them there were. There had to be 20 - 30 lions runnnig by. They just kept coming. But first there were 2 dragons that showed up with the really old sifu wearing the Hung Gar outfit...leather belt with studs and leather gauntlets with studs. He saw me and motioned for me to come out and perform with the troup but I couldn't. The parade organizers told him to keep moving. That would have been cool though. A couple people from the troup waved. I got it all on tape. Before we left we were tlaking with the Japanese contingent and we all took some fotos together. Around this time tons of Chinese had surrounded us to watch white and japanese people take funny pictures.
After the parade passed us we headed to the car. We were gonna take the car to the Flower Hotel for lunch. We should have walked the whole way. We walked about 10 minutes when we couldn't move in traffic. I have never seen the city so crowded. All of the 300,000 people of Xiaolan must have been out in full chinese force. Walking across the street at will. It was amazing. A pain in the ass, but amazing. And of course on the way there Toby started knocking the US for no reason. I had to hold back. I so wanted to punch him in the back of the head. Robert and Mark watched as I steadied myself and they giggled.
We decided to get out and walk after about 40 minutes of going pretty much no where. we got there 5 minutes later. On the way there, I introduced John to The Rev. Horton Heat with the song, "Bales of Cocaine". He got a kick out of it. As we walked into the entrance there was a long line of workers ready to greet us. "Hello". I go upstairs and meet with some people. We sit down and begin to eat. The bring around this pig that was really good. But they have cherries with blinkin lights inside that they use for eyes. It was wierd. We ate and had a good time. We also had some fish balls and fried bananas. I went to grab a fishball with my fingers because trying to pick them up with chopsticks is a major pain. They also had these little paper cups they were in, so I felt that you could pick them up. Lynn just said, "Aiya, that's so rude! Using your fingers." So I responded. "Oh...let me get this straight...its rude to take a fish ball from a plate with your fingers, but its not rude to pick your nose in public, belch/fart without saying excuse me, make horrendous sounds with your throat before spitting on sidewalks/walls/streets, and going to the bathroom on the sidewalk." She didnt say anything after that.
Now, this is where the day gets really interesting. Someone pulled out some Bei-jiu. (potent chinese wine). The stuff usually tastes vile, but this must have been expensive and potent because it tasted somewhat good and was most likely made with roses. It smelled good compared to the others stuff we usually get.
Now. We just had a couple shots to greet each other. But then some chinese came over and wouldn't let us get away with not doing some shots. So we did. After that, I cut myself off. The next time the waitress came by she tried to refill my glass but I said no. Then, more chinese came to celebrate with us. Our table was getting a bit louder...and crazier. It was from the alcohol...check the fotos for my flower debacle. So this other chinese guy got the waitress to fill my glass when I wasn't looking. He then gave me the cup and I said no. Originally I tried passing some sprite off as Bei-jiu, but that didnt' work. So, they were pushing me to drink it. I wasn't gonna drink it until the guy physically forced me to drink it. ...I know what you are thinking...how could I allow that. Ok.
1. I was already a bit tipsy from the previous stuff.
2. I was sitting down, he was standing, and the cup was near my mouth.
3. I am not gonna hit this guy or be that offensive.
4. He grabbed the glass and basically poured the stuff down my throat.
I was pissed don't get me wrong, i didnt want him to do that, but I was not in the position or right mind to do anything. The guy continued to hang around while other chinese toasted others at the table. This dude kept his hand on my shoulder. What's up with the touching dude. All the chinese have to touch.
He then gave me his card...i grabbed it with my teeth. If not drinking didn't offend him, that most likely did. Offend this, sucka! Lynn couldn't stop laughing. I told her to order me lots of tea and tea with sugar. I needed to flush my system, but I feared it was too late...and I was right. We'll get to that later.
As we head out to leave, we were some of the last ones to go, the waitresses and workers were standing in a long line to say goodbye. So, me, with a chrysanthemum on head and an orange in my mouth, motioned for a line of them to raise their right hand out. I ran down the line and High-Fived all of them. IT ROCKED! They all got a kick out of it. We then left the hotel. A little boy gave Rumi a flower so I had him give it to her again and I took a picture. It was so adorable.
The gang wanted to get some ice cream from McDonald's and Toby got all upset. I don't want to go to McDonald's. We are in Xiaolan why do we need to go to McDonald's. Well, Toby, there is no better ice cream in Xiaolan. McDonald's is the best. Its the truth. Chinese ice cream isn't very good. So, he waited outside as we got some ice cream.
We headed back to our place...its about 230/300PM. Once we got back to the house, we were playing pool, listening to music and hanging out. I was drinking tons of water. Just kept drinking it. But, I drank tooo much water. And proceeded to pray to the porcelain good...around 4pm. I felt worlds better afterwards. I gots to stop this.
So, i rested a bit...Toby passed out on the couch and was in the fetal position. The rest of us were just relaxing, playing pool, and just chilling. We had to be at the government building at 8pm for fireworks. So, Jolleen, John, and I headed over there on motorbike taxis and Rumi and Yumi took a motorized richshaw since they were wearing Yukatas. It was so crowded. We couldn't even make it the whole way on the taxis. we had to get off an walk. So we did that. We met up with Robert at the gate and waited for the rest of the gang. The fireworks display was really good. I got some video. John mentioned that we should be watching this to the sounds of The Scorpions "Rock You Like a Hurricane". That gave me a good thought....
After the fireworks were over John, Jolleen, Yumi, Rumi, and I went over to Rumi and Yumi's place so they could change, then we went to 1+1 so I could get some contact solution. Apparently supermarkets in China don't sell it. You have to get it from a place that sells glasses and contacts. Yumi happened to have an extra bottle, so I got one. We got to John's place where we were gonna watch a movie. I asked the girls if they liked horror movies and they all said, "Yes". Ok....so we popped in Dead Alive. giggle. The first scene Rumi and Yumi freaked when they lop the hand of the guy and then his other arm because he was bitten by the zombie monkey.
They spent about 3/4ths of the movie behind pillows. It was hilarious. I asked many times if they wanted to watching something else, "No, this is fine. :D" Ok.
I love so many scenes in that movie...."I kickass for the Lord!!!" The kung fu priest rules! And the infamous lawnmowing scene. Hilarious. "Party's over."
After the movie we all headed home. I need sleep. Goodnite all.