Guzhen Performance Tuesday Nite
Well, today since I don't have classes at all, I have to go help out with distributing flyers. We met at the office and went to one of the schools. Despite that I hate doing this, it was enjoyable because it was Peter, Clyde, and me passing them out to a bunch of Primary School kids. Clyde was pushing them onto people, even just random passerbys. I had gotten it down to an art. As the kids drive with their parents on the scooter, I hold the flyer out and the kid snags it without ever a stop. I also gave some to those who didnt' ask for it, for example, throwing a couple in their back trailer.
BOND feels that if they pass out these flyers, they will get more business. However, the problem with it is, after we pass them out, we see them litered all over the city. BOND should be arrested for littering. Another problem is that the prices for English classes are super expensive. Most likely too expensive for the people they are passing the flyers out too.
Basically, most kids would come get them because we are gweilos and they want to interact and stare at us. Clyde kept saying, "Here, feed other people's greed."
At one point some middleschoolers rode by on a bicycle and scream out, "FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!" The three of us couldn't help but laugh really hard. Hilarious.
After that was over, i headed to the gym, then went home to prepare for my Kindergarten class and stage performance in Guzhen.
For kindergarten I taught "Family" so I had them draw pictures and say who each member of the family was.
The stuff for Guzhen I got was this: Intro, Chinese Whispers (Telephone), Phil Says, Teach Left & Right, Hokey Pokey, Duck Duck Goose.
We took the BOND van at 7pm and got there, we were prepared by 740 to go. Sean went on first and did this thing with push ups and having kids say an animal while they do it. I think he underestimated how much time would drag on stage...30 minutes is a long time. So, after about 10 minutes or something, he pretty much ended. So, I went on and rocked the house. I was all like, "Are you ready to learn English?!"...Yeah!..."I said, Are you read to learn English?!"...Yeah!..."I can't hear ya! Are you ready to learn some English!!??"...YEAH!!..."ALRIGHT!"
I had tons of kids come up on stage for Chinese Whispers, more than I expected. These were the things i said: I am Chinese, I am a Jelly Donut, I am the Walrus - Goo Goo Ka Chu, Johnny Knoxville, Astronomical Anomaly, and Siu Lam Gung Fu Seng - Hou Hou Yeh.
Some of the responses were hilarious.
The end of the game came when a kid yelled out, "YOU ARE FAT!"
excuse me? what did you call me you Godless Little Bastard? you want to insult me in front of everyone? fine, I will humiliate you in front of everyone. I made him stand in the horse stance in the center of the stage in front of all the kids and audience members. That will make me gain face and cause you to lose some. Lessons need to be taught. The audience enjoyed that.
After that we played "Phil Says". I got them doing Gong Fu and the place loved it. Then I showed them the Left and Right stuff. Then we played Hokey Pokey. Everyone got a kick out of it. I then went off stage. I was up there for about 40 minutes. Then John came on and did Musical Chairs for about 25 minutes. When he was done, we realized we still had 10 minutes to kill. So Sean did a game for 5 minutes and I did Duck Duck Goose after that, and man, these kids were fast. I was totally not expecting it. Very different from Kindergarten. They kept taggin me. THIS IS NO FUN!
We have it all on video.
After that we went to Karaoke. Apparently this was the first Disco in town. Long before COWBOY Bar. To bad its the same crappy music. But anywho, we went into a Karaoke room. The one that the gang went to the night before. That's when Jane, the Boss's wife, got completely hammered and was falling on the ground. I have seen pictures from Peter. Also, hanging in this room are two really disturbing paintings.
1. What looks like the beast from Beauty and the Beast having intercourse with a naked white woman.
2. What looks like about 5 demons raping a naked white woman.
Why these PAINTINGS were hanging in the karaoke room of a club are beyond me. I mean, these aren't hentai, because they are paiting like a western style painting. Its just creepy.
So, basically, the gang of us started singing most of the english songs on the computer. They had alot surprisingly. We got to sing alot. Mostly it was me, John, and Peter that did most of it. Others sang too.
I only drank tea, but I was having such a blast that I seemed like I was...wait a second, no, I had two shots of Bei-Jiu. Nevermind.
Other than that, I headed home at 1AM.
I have most of the night on tape. I get to do it again tomorrow nite. YEAH!....NOT!